Monday, June 03, 2013

Series Preview- Marlins

Miami Marlins (16-41) @ Philadelphia Phillies (27-30)

Pitching Match-Ups:
Monday, 7:05 - Tom Koehler vs. KK
Tuesday, 7:05 - Ricky Nolasco vs. Petite Bone
Wednesday, 1:05 - Jacob Turner vs. Old Girl Parts (aka- Cole Hamels)

Marlins Bats:
R - 171 (Dead f'n last)
AVG - .228 (29th)
OPS - .614 (Dead f'n last)

Lets be real, this team sucks.  I honestly don't remember a team this void of MLB caliber players.  So many of these guys wouldn't even be on the bench of most MLB teams, let alone the starting lineup.  Marcell Ozuna/OF (.333/.855) and Chris Coghlan/OF (.297/.792) seem to be the only threats.

Marlins Arms:
ERA - 4.07 (17th)
WHIP - 1.35 (24th)

The starting pitching in this series is capable of shutting down the Phillies offense [Koehler (3.22/1.07), Nolasco (3.69/1.15), and Turner (1 start, 0.00 ERA)].  Of course, Adam Eaton might toss a no-hitter against this sad sack of a squad too.  Even that douche-nugget, Chad Qualls, is pitching well for them (2.95/1.08).

Low scoring series and the Phils still won't reach even ground (.500).

Big Z Update:
Carlos Zambrano has completed the first leg of his minor league tour. He made 2 starts for the Clearwater Threshers, twirling 10.1 scoreless innings. Next destinations- Reading or Lehigh Valley.


Preserve Jon said...

(To the tune of the Beach Boys song Barbara Ann)

Dom, Dom, Dom...DomDom'nicBrown
Dom, Dom, Dom...DomDom'nicBrown

Oh Dom'nic Brown...Yes you can...
Dom'nic Brown

You're-a rockin and a rollin, hitting-in-a-groove
Dom'nic Brown
DomDomDom Dom'nic Brown

Chorus util the outtro.

Went to a game, tryin to stay sane
Saw Dom'nic Brown, thought I'd give him a chance

(Chorus 2x)

Since Patty-B
Tried May-BERR-y
But none of them would do...

Dom, Dom, Dom...DomDom'nicBrown
Dom, Dom, Dom...DomDom'nicBrown

Oh Dom'nic Brown...You're the man...
Dom'nic Brown

GM-Carson said...

Nicely done. This will get it's own post.

Anonymous said...

Cesar stay, Minimart goes. Kinda surprised by this. Usually they get it wrong.

Ben said...

How cruel of them to bring Martinez up and let the poor guy lower his lifetime OPS+ from 39 to 38. Good riddance.

Believe it or not most Phillies regulars have managed to get their OPS+ up to 90 or higher except for Delmon and Revere, who have a beautiful 80 and 56 OPS+ and earn my scorn more each game.

The catch is only Brown (138), Utley (119), and Frandsen (117) have had above average seasons at the plate. Everyone else is a little below average, which adds up to an offense that is a lot below average.

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Ben said...

Hittin' Weather.

jo momma said...

Domain Brown is awesome.

Bob D said...

Love the song!

Revere with finally a good game. I still don't think he is a top CF but he is passable at the position.

Why demote MiniMart? We are doomed now!

KK quickly becoming a top pitcher (dare we say an Ace?) and is a potential All Star this year.

Lee Brown Pap & KK @ All Star Game??? hmmm fairly good chance

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GM-Carson said...

Lee, Brown, and KK definitely deserve the All Star nod. Papelbon is an elite closer, but he doesn't have the saves right now to rank with the best this season. That's not his fault though.

Anonymous said...

I'm doubting KK makes it. There is a lot of competition in front of him.