Monday, October 31, 2011
Back Row: Charlies Manuel, Ruben Amaro, Bea Arthur, & Roy Halladay
Front Row: Joe Blanton, Cole Hamels, Cliff Lee, & Vance Worley
With 5 straight NL East Division championships heading into the 2012 season, a 6th will be on the line and the above cast of characters will play a large role in that expected success. You've got the fearless leader- Fuqua, smug GM- Rube, good luck charm- Bea, and starting rotation- Doc, Lee, Hamels, Blanton, and the Vanimal.
Saturday, October 29, 2011
WSBGMs Offseason Plans:
*Fill in the Blanks (ex - Ryan Howard is __________.)
*Phlashback Phridays (ex - Noles & Thon: The Dickies)
*Phillies themed crossword puzzles (ex - Phighin' Phils)
*Name that Phillie (ex - Who the hell is this?)
*Random funny Phils inspired Photoshops (ex - Fuqua + Quotes + Photoshop)
*Song parodies (ex - Bohemian Manuel)
*What's the #?
*Off Beat Wednesday (chance to blog about anything we desire, but usually still rooted in baseball)
*Fan Caves (Corey and I will each share pictures of ours, in hopes that you'll show us yours...sounds so perverted)
Friday, October 28, 2011
Charles In Charge
Show description – Charles is a young baseball player but only can get contract offers from teams in Japan. To work on his game, he takes a part-time job living with a host family. He stays in their basement and in return babysits the family’s children and occasionally gives them love and hitting advice. His quirky friend, Buddy, is always hanging around. Hilarity ensues.
Episode 1- “Buddy Better Start Hitting”
Show Highlights – Charles takes Buddy to the batting cage. Buddy sucks. However, Charles notices that Buddy is exceedingly quick. Buddy gets 100+ at-bats for the Charles’ rec league softball team and hits a shade over .190.
Show description: Charlie leads a team of sharply dressed crime scene investigators who solve murder mysteries in southern Florida.
Episode 1- “Moonshot Over Miami”
Show Highlights – The show has a sizzling opening that climaxes in one of Fuqua’s classic one liners:
Scene – Marlins Ballpark, 8th inning of a game in September
Police Officer – Sir, we found a murder victim sitting in a seat above the left field wall. It was reported by a fan in one of the luxury boxes, just after Hanley Ramirez refused to run out a grounder in the 7th.
Charlie – Well, our dad-gum suspect is probably still here. Call my wife, officer, tell her… [slowly and deliberately puts on sunglasses] that I’ve gone… fishing.
/cue Roger Daltrey’s yell
Other highlights include Charlie picking up Jack McKeon’s cigar butt and placing it in a plastic bag using forceps and Charlie enjoying a mojito, shirtless sunbathing on South Beach.
The Cosby Show
Show description – Dr. Charles Manuel lives and works out of his brownstone townhouse in Old City Philadelphia accompanied by his lawyer wife and five children. Hilarity ensues.
Episode 1 – Who’s Dad-gum Kids Are These?”
Show Highlights – Dr. Manuel wastes no time in asking for a paternity test for each and every kid. When the tests show that the father is actually arch rival Dr. Dusty Baker, Charlie files for divorce. There will be no further episodes.
Thursday, October 27, 2011
1. Schmidt's successor
6. Gold Glove catcher of '99
9. 2nd baseman that shared name with famous mouse
11. Lovingly referred to as "Tank"
2. Pompous ass
3. Outfielder that spelled 1st name with a double "g"
4. Created a stir in his rookie season, some sort of "mania"
5. Fell 2 homeruns shy of 400 for his career
7. Bible toting ex-porn addict
8. Mr. Smuggy McSmuggerson (aka- our GM)
*Answers- last name only
Wednesday, October 26, 2011
Tuesday, October 25, 2011
Monday, October 24, 2011
"We will remain in contact with representatives for both players about the possibility of bringing them back for the 2012 season,” said the omnipotent one Ruben Amaro Jr.
In my opinion, Phils have more pressing needs than retaining either of their services, but at the right price, I'd welcome both back. Lidge 1 year $1.5M with incentives. Oswalt 2 years $16M. However, each likely wants more, and rightfully so...so sayonara.
Saturday, October 22, 2011
Stand-Up Fundraiser for LLS:
Please join Abbe Meck and Van Kapeghian (aka- FuriousBall) in our fight against blood cancers. Thursday, December 1st we are proud to present Mo Mandel (who you may know from Modern Family and Chelsea Lately) at Helium Comedy Club in Philly! Abbe and Van are running the Disney Marathon in January and seeking to raise over $10,000 toward the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society. They will be running a half marathon and full marathon on consecutive days, that's 39.3 miles - please join us in this fight!
Tickets are $15 per person, please contact Van Kapeghian (phone: 609-969-2387 or email: firstname.lastname@example.org) for tickets. If you are unable to attend but would still like to support this cause, please visit All For Layna.
Friday, October 21, 2011
Thursday, October 20, 2011
Silence of the Fuqua
Fuqua. Charles Fuqua.
Wednesday, October 19, 2011
Tuesday, October 18, 2011
Monday, October 17, 2011
Huh? You don't know if he can handle the job but the Phillies should give him the job merely to get younger? Like getting younger for the sake of getting younger somehow benefits the club. Idiocy. Under this logic, the Phillies should sign my son and Carson's two boys. They can't play baseball above the tee-ball level, but they are extremely young and cheap. I know for a fact my boy will play shortstop for the Phillies for juice boxes and bar-b-q potato chips. No salary necessary. This way the Phillies can get younger and they can significantly reduce payroll.
Tomorrow on the blog - Off-Season Priority #2
Sunday, October 16, 2011
Saturday, October 15, 2011
To all the Howard apologists...ease down, I know your dander is up. He's not the only one at fault, or is he?
Other Phillies Over Same Span:
Chase Utley - .286/1.012, 20 R, 6 HR, 14 RBI, 5 SB, and 12 K.
Jimmy Rollins - .273/.694, 10 R, 6 RBI, 7 SB, and 10 K.
Shane Victorino - .231/.571, 10 R, 9 RBI, and 7 K.
Raul Ibanez - .246/.698, 4 R, 8 RBI, and 22 K.
Carlos Ruiz - .197/.687, 8 R, 4 RBI, and 12 K.
Okay, so clearly nobody aside from Utley has been stellar. However, remember Chooch is the 8 hole hitter and steady production isn't really expected of that spot in the lineup. Victorino's OPS is low, but he still produced more total runs. Howard has failed in the last 4 postseason series, plain and simple. And that makes for a sickening Staturday.
Friday, October 14, 2011
Regular Season- 558 W/414 L (.574%)
Postseason (2007-2011) 27 W/19 L (.587%)
1. Cole Hamels/SP (2006-2011)
2. Jon Lieber/SP (2006-2007)
3. Cory Lidle/SP (2006)
4. Randy Wolf/SP (2006)
5. Gavin Floyd/SP (2006)
6. Jamie Moyer/SP (2006-2010)
7. Adam Bernero/SP (2006)
8. Adam Eaton/SP (2007-2008)
9. Kyle Kendrick/SP (2007-2011)
10. Kyle Lohse/SP (2007)
11. Freddy Garcia/SP (2007)
12. Zack Segovia/SP (2007)
13. JA Happ/SP (2007-2010)
14. Joe Blanton/SP (2008-2011)
15. Cliff Lee/SP (2009 & 2011)
16. Rodrigo Lopez/SP (2009)
17. Pedro Martinez/SP (2009)
18. Roy Halladay/SP (2010-2011)
19. Roy Oswalt/SP (2010-2011)
20. JD Durbin/SP/RP (2007)
21. Brett Myers/SP/RP (2006-2009)
22. Scott Mathieson/SP/RP ('06 & '10-11)
23. Eude Brito/SP/RP (2006)
24. Chan Ho Park/SP/RP (2009)
25. Ryan Madson/SP/RP (2006-2011)
26. John Ennis/SP/RP (2007)
27. Andrew Carpenter/SP/RP (2008-2011)
28. Antonio Bastardo/SP/RP (2009-2011)
29. Vance Worley/SP (2010-2011)
30. Aaron Fultz/RP (2006)
31. Ryan Franklin/RP (2006)
32. Fabio Castro/RP (2006-2007)
33. Geoff Geary/RP (2006-2007)
34. Julio Santana/RP (2006)
35. Clay Condrey/RP (2006-2009)
36. Rheal Cormier/RP (2006)
37. Matt Smith/RP (2006-2007)
38. Rick White/RP (2006)
39. Arthur Rhodes/RP (2006)
40. Brian Sanches/RP (2006-2007)
41. Tom Gordon/RP (2006-2008)
42. Francisco Rosario/RP (2007)
43. JC Romero/RP (2007-2011)
44. Kane Davis/RP (2007)
45. Joe Bisensius/RP (2007)
46. Jose Mesa/RP (2007)
47. Yoel Hernandez/RP (2007)
48. Anderson Garcia/RP (2007)
49. Mike Zagurski/RP ('07 & '10-11)
50. Chad Durbin/RP (2008-2010)
51. Antonio Alfonseca/RP (2007)
52. RJ Swindle/RP (2008)
53. Les Walrond/RP (2008)
54. Rudy Seanez/RP (2008)
55. Brad Lidge/RP (2008-2011)
56. Scott Eyre/RP (2008-2009)
57. Jack Taschner/RP (2009)
58. Tyler Walker/RP (2009)
59. Steven Register/RP (2009)
60. Sergio Escalona/RP (2009)
61. Nelson Figueroa/RP (2010)
62. David Herndon/RP (2010-2011)
63. Danys Baez/RP (2010-2011)
64. Nate Robertson/RP (2010)
65. Jose Contreras/RP (2010-2011)
66. Joe Savery/RP (2011)
67. Justin De Fratus/RP (2011)
68. Michael Stutes/RP (2011)
69. Juan Perez/RP (2011)
70. Michael Schwimer/RP (2011)
71. Mike Lieberthal/C (2006)
72. Chris Coste/C (2006-2009)
73. Sal Fasano/C (2006)
74. Carlos Ruiz/C (2006-2011)
75. Rod Barajas/C (2007)
76. Lou Marson/C (2008-2009)
77. Paul Bako/C (2009)
78. Paul Hoover/C (2009-2010)
79. Brian Schneider/C (2010-2011)
80. Dane Sardinha/C (2010-2011)
81. Erik Kratz/C (2011)
82. Ryan Howard/1B (2006-2011)
83. Mike Sweeney/1B (2010)
84. Chase Utley/2B (2006-2011)
85. Tadahito Iguchi/2B (2007-2008)
86. Brad Harman/2B (2008)
87. Jimmy Rollins/SS (2006-2011)
88. Brian Bocock/SS (2010)
89. David Bell/3B (2006)
90. Wes Helms/3B (2007)
91. Pedro Feliz/3B (2008-2009)
92. Mike Cervenak/3B (2008)
94. Placido Polanco/3B (2010-2011)
95. Greg Dobbs/3B/OF/1B (2007-2010)
96. Ross Gload/1B/OF (2010-2011)
97. Danny Sandoval/UTL (2006)
98. Abraham Nunez/UTL (2006-2007)
99. Alex Gonzalez/UTL (2006)
100. Jose Hernandez/UTL (2006)
101. Joe Thurston/UTL (2006)
102. Russell Branyan/UTL (2007)
103. Eric Bruntlett/UTL (2008-2009)
104. Miguel Cairo/UTL (2009)
105. Wilson Valdez/UTL (2010-2011)
106. Juan Castro/UTL (2010)
107. Cody Ransom/UTL (2010)
108. Pete Orr/UTL (2011)
109. Michael Martinez (2011)
110. Randall Simon/PH (2006)
111. Pete LaForest/PH (2007)
112. Andy Tracy/PH (08-09)
113. Chris Snelling/PH (2008)
114. John Bowker/PH (2011)
115. Brandon Moss/PH (2011)
116. Pat Burrell/LF (2006-2008)
117. Raul Ibanez/LF (2009-2011)
118. Aaron Roward/CF (2006-2007)
119. Shane Victorino/CF (2006-2011)
120. Bobby Abreu/RF (2006)
121. Jayson Werth/RF (2007-2010)
122. Geoff Jenkins/RF (2008)
123. Domonic Brown/RF (2010-2011)
124. Hunter Pence/RF (2011)
125. David Dellucci/OF (2006)
126. Jeff Conine/OF (2006)
127. Chris Roberson/OF (2006-2007)
128. Michael Bourn/OF (2006-2007)
129. So Taguchi/OF (2008)
130. Matt Stairs/OF (2008-2009)
131. Greg Golson/OF (2008)
132. TJ Bohn/OF (2008)
133. Ben Francisco/OF (2009-2011)
134. John Mayberry Jr./OF (2009-2011)
Charlie Manuel/Manager (2006-2011)
Gary Varsho/Bench (2006)
Jimy Williams/Bench (2007-2008)
Pete Mackanin/Bench (2009-2011)
Rich Dubee/Pitching (2006-2011)
Milt Thompson/Hitting (2006-2010)
Greg Gross/Hitting (2010-2011)
Marc Bombard/1st Base (2006)
Davey Lopez/1st Base (2007-2010)
Bill Dancy/3rd Base (2006)
Steve Smith/3rd Base (2007-2008)
Sam Perlozzo/3rd Base/1st Base (2009-2011)
Juan Samuel/3rd Base (2011)
Ramon Henderson/BP (2006-2008)
Mick Bellmeyer/BP (2009-2011)
*Pat Gillick/GM (2006-2008)
*Ruben Amaro Jr./GM (2009-2011)
Thursday, October 13, 2011
Ryan Howard had surgery to repair his ruptured Achilles tendon yesterday and the timetable for his return is 5-6 months, with the Phillies saying likely April. Power comes from the legs in both pitching and hitting, and without a good base struggles occur. Howard already struggles enough, so being pessimistic about the long term effect this has on him is natural. Thank God for that extension though...NOT!
Yes, I just broke out a lame 90's joke. Deal with it.
Manuel Wants More:
Fuqua spoke his mind the other day and wants more stability at 3rd base and an improved approach at the plate next season from all the hitters. Also, he expects the World Series, not just the playoffs. Great! No go do it.
"I take a lot of pride in hitters. I get upset sometimes when we don't hit as good as I want us to hit or think we should hit. Let me tell you something. I don't care whether you like it or not, I know how good a hitting coach I am. Whether you want to believe that or whatever, really. We will get better. The pitchers make adjustments and the hitters have to make adjustments. If you don't like to or are afraid to go deep in the count or to hit with two strikes on you, you are going to get anxious, you'll be aggressive and chase bad balls. At times, we'll take a fastball right down the middle, some guy will throw a breaking ball down and we'll roll over it and swing at it and miss. That's not good hitting. We talk about that all the time."
~Charles Fuqua Manuel
As far as upgrading 3rd, that's not so easily done. Aramis Ramirez is the only major upgrade available on the market, and he's likely to be expensive. Utility players capable of playing 3rd include Clint Barmes, Wilson Betemit, Jamey Carroll, and Jerry Hairston, but none are really any better than Polanco (who just had double hernia surgery and may miss the beginning of the season). However, any of them would make an excellent addition to the Phillies weak bench.
Rollins is All About the Money:
Jimmy Rollins wants a 5 year contract and will not accept anything lower than a 4 year deal with a 5th year player option. I would never do that. He's injured and declining and plays a speed position. 3 years tops, and that could be sketchy. J-Roll wants the money, and he, just like Jayson Werth is going to the place that gives him the most (as do most free agents). I just hope that place isn't Philadelphia under those conditions (years/$).
From Sir Alden-
J-Roll is worth 3 years at 8 Mil with a 4th Year Option at 8 Mil/3 Mil buyout tops.
No one cheered more loudly than I did when J-Roll hit the ball on the screws and began to run for his 20th Triple 5 years ago.
He has been injured and on the DL 3 times in the last 2 years. He must take that into account, and that Father Time works on all of us.
He has no interest in a 1 year $12 Mil contract where he could show that the injuries are behind him.
The Phillies are bidding against themselves and San Francisco. I am pretty sure the Giants have learned their lesson with Aaron "Face Plant" Rowand.
Aug 31, 2011
"In a clear message from management, the Giants have designated Miguel Tejada and Aaron Rowand for assignment. The Giants crossed a big bridge by swallowing the $12 million owed to Rowand in 2012 but Sabean said that wasn’t much of a speed bump for ownership. They signed off on the move without delay. The total amount they ate on Rowand was almost $14 million, including the salary still owed to him this year."
The Dodgers and Oakland A's will never sign Rollins for over 3 years.
The Phillies won 102 Games with him on the DL for a good chunk of the season. Hamels, a top closer, and even Roy Oswalt if he would take a Carpenter-like 2 years at 10 Mil per year contract are more important.
And - they need to roll the dice on Aramis Ramirez at 3B.
Wednesday, October 12, 2011
It’s always good to see organizations (that aren’t in Philadelphia) fall apart at the seams. I understand why Tito wants to leave. I can even understand why Theo wants to leave. But why are “team sources” blasting Francona to the local media? Unless this is a personal thing between Francona and the source, it seems absurd that any member of an organization would start drug dependence rumors on a departing manager, especially one as successful as Francona. I could see if this was Phillies era Francona. Those teams consistently sucked. Hell, even Rich Kotite and Ray Rhodes left this town without “drug dependence” allegations.
Tuesday, October 11, 2011
Polly just turned 36 years old yesterday and is still under contract for the 2012 season. Now that PEDs are being removed from the game, players aren't producing into their late 30's like they were a decade ago. Polanco plays quality defense, but his bat and health are quickly deteriorating. Games played have steadily dipped since arriving in Philly (only 122 in '11) as well has his OPS (down to .674 this year). Hernia, elbow problems, bulging disk in his back, big headiness...he's a
With the Phillies offense getting older, less productive, and more injury prone, maybe it's to bring in some new blood at the hot corner next year and give Polanco super-sub duties (spot starts at 3rd, 2nd, and SS to rest the regulars).
Who to bring in? Aramis Ramirez on a 2 year $24M deal, but he's creeping up there in years too and might want more years and more money. Trade Vance Worley to the Kansas City Royals for Mike Moustakas. Michael Cuddyer, because he can play all over the diamond and has a decent bat.
Monday, October 10, 2011
Congratulations to Mark Reynolds of the Baltimore Orioles, the winner of The Howard in 2011. This is his third consecutive honor.
The Howard Standings:
M. Reynolds/BAL - 5
D. Valencia/MIN - 3
J. Arencibia/TOR - 2
A. Beltre/TEX - 2
W. Betemit/KCR & DET - 2
P. Burrell/SFG - 2
A. Cabrera/CLE - 2
M. Cabrera/DET - 2
M. Carp/SEA - 2
L. Chisenhall/CLE - 2
N. Cruz/TEX - 2
M. Kemp/LAD - 2
J. Kipnis/CLE - 2
B. Lillibridge/CHW - 2
C. Pena/CHC - 2
R. Roberts/ARI - 2
A. Soriano/CHC - 2
K. Suzuki/OAK - 2
C. Utley/PHI - 2
P. Alvarez/PIT - 1
A. Avila/DET - 1
M. Aviles/KCR - 1
E. Aybar/LAA - 1
C. Barmes/HOU - 1
J. Bautista/TOR - 1
L. Berkman/STL - 1
Y. Betancourt/MIL - 1
M. Bradley/SEA - 1
J. Buck/FLA - 1
R. Davis/TOR - 1
S. Duncan/CLE - 1
D. Fowler/COL - 1
D. Freese/STL - 1
K. Fukudome/CLE - 1
S. Fuld/TBR - 1
J. Giambi/COL - 1
J. Gomes/WAS - 1
B. Hawpe/SDP - 1
C. Heisey/CIN - 1
R. Howard/PHI - 1
O. Infante/FLA - 1
A. Jackson/DET - 1
K. Johnson/ARI - 1
R. Johnson/SDP - 1
A. Jones/BAL - 1
C. Jones/ATL - 1
M. Joyce/TBR - 1
H. Kendrick/LAA - 1
P. Konerko/CHW - 1
M. Laporta/CLE - 1
C. Lee/PHI - 1
A. Liddi/SEA - 1
E. Longoria/TBR - 1
J. Mayberry/PHI - 1
M. Montero/ARI - 1
M. Morse/WSH - 1
M. Moustakas/KCR - 1
X. Nady/ARI - 1
M. Napoli/TEX - 1
C. Nelson/COL - 1
M. Olivo/SEA - 1
H. Pence/HOU - 1
B. Phillips/CIN - 1
A. Pierzynski/CHW - 1
A. Pujols/STL - 1
R. Raburn/DET - 1
A. Ramirez/CHC - 1
A. Ramirez/CHW - 1
J. Reddick/BOS - 1
J. Saltalamacchia/BOS - 1
G. Sanchez/FLA - 1
K. Seager/SEA - 1
S. Sizemore/OAK - 1
Y. Torrealba/TEX - 1
J. Towles/HOU - 1
M. Trumbo/LAA - 1
B. Upton/TBR - 1
J. Votto/CIN - 1
J. Werth/WSH - 1
M. Wieters/BAL - 1
T. Wigginton/COL - 1
J. Willingham/OAK - 1
B. Wood/PIT - 1
K. Youkilis/BOS - 1
Inside the Numbers:
*Cliff Lee became the first pitcher to perform this feat.
*Wilson Betemit was the only player to do it for two different teams this year (Royals and Tigers).
*Jarrod Saltalamacchia know holds the record for player with the longest last name to complete The Howard.
*Mark Reynolds have committed 14 Howards since the stat's creation.
*Bunch of rookies on this list- Mike Carp, Jason Kipnis, JC Arencibia, Lonnie Chisenhall, Adam Liddi, Kyle Seager, and Mark Trumbo.
*There were a total of 107 Howards this season by 84 players. This is in line with the past two seasons: 2010- 112/82 and 2009- 111/90. Amazing how consistent this is.
*There were 5 Howards by Phillies this year.
*The Howards of 2011 will now be archived near the bottom of the left sidebar.
Sunday, October 09, 2011
Placido Polanco - hurt. And old.
Hunter Pence - hurt.
Cole Hamels - hurt. Double whammy.
1) Ryan Howard has a ruptured Achilles and will require surgery. Timetable for return cannot be determined until post-op and the operation cannot take place until swelling goes down. It's believed that he'll miss a couple months of the 2012 season and there's a chance he'll never be the same. Is now a good time to bitch about Amaro signing him to that extension again? Because, need I remind you, Howard would have been a free agent this offseason and surely wouldn't have nabbed 5 years and $125 million while broken.
2) Polly has a sports hernia and surgery is forthcoming. He's back again next year, meaning we can look forward to even less production than he provided this year. We're talking a .260ish singles hitter. Oh, eff!
3) Pence also has a sports hernia, who knew? Well, Hunter did...or did he? Anyway, he'll have a MRI to determine the extent of the damage and go from there.
4) Cole has loose bodies in his elbow and a inguinal hernia. He'll undergo two surgeries. That's two surgeries too many!
*Type in "hernia" in a Google image search with safe search filters off and be disgusted.
Unless you are attending one of the sports medicine schools. Then you probably won’t be disgusted by any sports injury.
Saturday, October 08, 2011
Friday, October 07, 2011
Thursday, October 06, 2011
Without an alcohol induced haze, relaxation is likely out of the question until Game 5 of the NLDS is over.
Therefore, I felt it necessary to divert your stress from the impending
Uh, that's random.
Not as random as you think. Got the newest edition of ESPN the Magazine today. It's their "Body" issue, and one of those bodies is...
Gag me with a spoon!