Monday, June 06, 2011

Longview - Phillies Edition

Sit around and watch the Phils, but no one scores
I watch them struggle for an hour or two
Listen to Wheels just for a bit
I'm sick of innings without hits
A bad at bat by Francisco
And I'm freaking pissed

Punch my couch and slap my face
I need to go to my “happy place”
I'm so damn mad I'm going blind
Cuz they hit like shit

Peel his hands out from his pants and get them moving
They sure as hell can't do it by themselves
He says that hits will come with heat
Warm days make shutouts obsolete
But I don’t trust that slow talkin’ man
Cuz he can’t double switch

Punch my couch and slap my face
I need to go to my “happy place”
I'm so damn mad I'm going blind
Cuz they hit like shit

They got no motivation
Where is their motivation?
No time for new motivation
Can’t wait for arbitration

Sit around and watch the Phils, but no one’s scoring
Call them pathetic, call them what you will
Why does Greg Gross still have a job?
He doesn’t deserve the one he's got
When watching the Mets lose isn’t enough
You're freaking lonely

Punch my couch and slap my face
I need to go to my “happy place”
I'm so damn mad I'm going blind
And Martinez is such a waste
Punch my couch and slap my face
Going way to my “happy place”
Some say, "Marathon, not sprint."
But it's just a myth


Preserve Jon said...


By the way, although I share your animosity towards MiniMart, I have taken the historical view (AKA the Valdez Quotient) that his presence on the roster will, at some point this season, prove critical. I'm not advocating that he will shine at this predicted critical juncture, but I think such a time during which MiniMart will be able to prove himself worthy of his roster spot will posit itself.

Ok, that's enough nonsensical douchebaggery for today.

Just found out my buddy got hold of some free tix for Thursday's game. I was stoked until I realized it's KKs turn in the rotation. Still going, but th odds of a victory went down quite a bit.

GM-Carson said...

They're playing the Cubbies on Thursday, I'm sure Chicago will play like the Triple-A club that Zambrano's says they are.

ripjgarcia said...

I forgot about Greg Gross.

SirAlden said...

Hope the Phillies Draft some Hitters beginning tonight.

GM-Carson said...

Phils farm system is stocked with arms, especially in Single-A Clearwater and Lakewood.

Aside from Cody Overbeck and Matt Rizzotti, they really don't have much talent bat-wise in the upper minors.

Corey said...

and both of those guys are first basemen.

Bob D said...

I say replace MiniMart with Bill Hall who is available for 2 or 3 mil. He can/has played every position except 1B & C. He has some power as a righthanded bat and some speed. He wont hit for a high average, but his average of 250 is still 70 points higher than Mini Mart. He also provides a solid replacement for Utley, Rollins, and Polanco if they are injured.

The minors does need some bats, they can afford going a bit light on pitching to improve at position players for one year.

Bob D said...

Overbeck is a thirdbaseman, left fielder, and first baseman.

GM-Carson said...

Overbeck is a defensive liability, that's what he is. Maybe he can end up playing LF well enough to stick in the bigs some day.

Rizzotti is trade bait this summer.

On Bill Hall, if no team claims him on waivers then he is free to sign with anyone. If the Phils sign him, it would be for the prorated MLB minimum with the Astros on the hook for the remainder of his contract.

ripjgarcia said...

Anybody notice that Dominic Brown is quietly hitting 3 and a little change since Amaro declared him not ready to come up to the majors.

Corey said...

overbeck this year:
1B - 29 games
DH - 16 games
OF - 7 games
3B - 1 game

rizzotti this year:
1B - 26 games
DH - 27 games

that team has two first baseman. the one just happens be able to occasionally shag a few fly balls.

GM-Carson said...

Ethier isn't even in the lineup tonight. Lee needs to start pitching consistently well, and the Phils need to open this series with a win.