The regular crowd leaves the stands
There's an old man standing next to me
Makin' love to his pants with his hands
He says, "Son, can you teach them to hit a curve
Take and hack and ‘Back she goes’
You know I could really swing a mean stick
When I wore a younger man's clothes."
La la la, di da da
La la, di da da da dum
Teach them to hit, you’re the hitting coach
Teach them to hit tonight
Well, we're all in the mood for some hits and runs
But this team ain’t feelin' alright
Now Mick in the ‘pen he’s a friend of mine
Knows every pitch thrown by Marquis
He likes when they whine cuz he’s stealin’ their sign
But there's someplace that he'd rather be
He says, "Milt, I believe this is killing me."
He’s been grumpy the entire home stand
"Well I'm sure that I could get a hit or two
If I had a bat in my hand"
Oh, la la la, di da da
La la, di da da da dum
It's a pretty good crowd for a Saturday
And the manager gives me a smile
'Cause he knows it’s not me why they swing like amputee
Says the hits will come in awhile
And the swings, it sounds like a ceiling fan
Whiff after whiff after whiff
I should be concerned, I found out that they learned
Hitting from a video with Fred McGriff
Oh, la la la, di da da
La la, di da da da dum
Teach them to hit, you’re the hitting coach
Teach them to hit tonight
Well, we're all in the mood for some hits and runs
But this team ain’t feelin' alright









"You are used to guys who have everyday stuff, but it’s very rare that you see a knuckleballer. Two in a row is even rarer — like Halley’s Comet," said Ryan Howard. "Tomorrow we get a regular pitcher and try to right the ship."


































