For Poops & Chuckles

Never forget to hate the Mets.

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"What's up brah?"
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Bait the Hook:
Rube is casting his line with minor league bait, hoping to reel in another lefty for the bullpen. Ron Mahay and Alam Embree are being floated as the fish to land, and either of them would be a fine addition to aquarium of relievers. I'm actually a Mahay fan, seeing as he's a converted outfielder from the BoSox system (debuted in '95 as an OF). Embree seems a bit busted, but a minor league deal is worth the spring audition.

Name That Player #20

Standings:
Andrew - 5
Preserve Jon - 3
Caleb - 3
Joseph - 2
8008 WFC's - 2
Mike The Mac Guy - 1
Jstocksazag12 - 1
Roy - 1
Utility Derek - 1

This former Phillie played all over the National and American League. He only spent a portion of a season in red pinstripes. He averaged 3.4 homeruns per season, but that wasn't really his forte. Name that player.

Name That Player #19

Standings:
Andrew - 5
Preserve Jon - 3
Joseph - 2
Caleb - 2
8008 WFC's - 2
Mike The Mac Guy - 1
Jstocksazag12 - 1
Roy - 1
Utility Derek - 1

This mulleted man never played for the Phillies, but he has worked for them in some capacity. His high school has a strange tie-in to me. Go ahead, name that player.

2010 Philadelphia Phillies 25-man Roster

(2009 stats in parentheses)
Everyday Position Players:
Ryan Howard, first base- .279/.931, 105 r, 45 hr, 141 rbi
Chase Utley, second base- .282/.905, 112 r, 31 hr, 93 rbi, 23 sb
Jimmy Rollins, shortstop- .250/.719, 100 r, 21 hr, 77 rbi, 31 sb
Placido Polanco, third base- .285/.727, 82 r, 10 hr, 72 rbi
Raul Ibanez, leftfield- .272/.899, 93 r, 34 hr, 93 rbi
Shane Victorino, centerfield- .292/.803, 102 r, 10 hr, 62 rbi, 25 sb
Jayson Werth, rightfield- .268/.879, 98 r, 36 hr, 99 rbi, 20 sb
Carlos Ruiz, catcher- .255/.780, 32 r, 9 hr, 43 rbi


Bench:
Brian Schneider, catcher- .218/.627
Greg Dobbs, corner infield/outfield- .247/.679
Juan Castro, utility infield- .277/.650
Ross Gload, first base/corner outfield- .261/.729
Ben Francisco, outfield- .257/.779, 58 r, 15 hr, 46 rbi, 14 sb

Rotation:
Roy Halladay- 17 w, 239 ip, 208 k, 2.79 ERA, 1.13 WHIP
Cole Hamels- 10 w, 193.2 ip, 168 k, 4.32 ERA, 1.29 WHIP
Joe Blanton- 12 w, 195.1 ip, 163 k, 4.05 ERA, 1.32 WHIP
JA Happ- 12 w, 166 ip, 119 k, 2.93 ERA, 1.24 WHIP
*Jamie Moyer- 12 w, 162 ip, 94 k, 4.94 ERA, 1.36 WHIP


Bullpen:
*Brad Lidge- 31 sv, 58.2 ip, 61 k, 7.21 ERA, 1.81 WHIP
Ryan Madson- 5 w, 10 sv, 77.1 ip, 78 k, 3.26 ERA, 1.23 WHIP
Danys Baez- 4 w, 71.2 ip, 40 k, 4.02 ERA, 1.13 WHIP
*JC Romero- 16.2 ip, 12 k, 2.70 ERA, 1.56 WHIP
Chad Durbin- 69.2 ip, 62 k, 4.39 ERA, 1.48 WHIP
Jose Contreras- 6 w, 131.2 ip, 106 k, 4.92 ERA, 1.47 WHIP
Kyle Kendrick, Antonio Bastardo, Sergio Escalona, Scott Mathieson, and Andrew Carpenter will be competing for the 12 spot on the pitching staff.

*= Possible DL to begin season

Jose Contreras - A Career In Photos

1989 as Hoke Colburn in "Driving Miss Daisy."


1991 as Azeem in "Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves."


1992 as Ned Logan in "Unforgiven."


1994 as Ellis Boyd Redding in "The Shawshank Redemption."


1995 as Detective Lt. William Somerset in "Se7en."


2004 as Eddie "Scrap Iron" Dupris in "Million Dollar Baby."


2007 as God in "Evan Almighty."


2007 as Carter Chambers in "The Bucket List."

The Young and the Restless

Check out this collection of Phillies players from their younger years.

Do the Pirates Suck?

A week or so ago I posted the following on More Hardball.

The city of Pittsburgh has the Penguins and the Steelers. Typically playoff caliber teams. Then they have the Pirates. Seventeen straight losing seasons. Wow. When I was a kid they had Sid Bream, Bobby Bonilla, Barry Bonds, Andy Van Slyke, Doug Drabek, John Smiley, and the Jolly Roger flying high. Since then, down the shitter. The Buccos play in beautiful PNC Park, which I finally visited this past season. That park deserves a better product on the field. A look at the Pirates current clubhouse composition and you will find a product far from quality, it's quite putrid.

Andrew McCutchen has star power. The rest of the team, not so much. The offense on paper appears to be one of the worst in recent memory. It's like they're a team full of middle infielders from the 70's. You'd think with all those high draft picks that they'd be able to put together a solid homegrown team in the mold of the Tampa Bay Rays, but not much hope is on the horizon aside from Pedro Alvarez and Jose Tabata. I'm a Philadelphia Phillies Phan phirst and phoremost, but being from Pennsylvania, I'd still like to see the Pirates be competitive.


Was I being to hard on this franchise fallen upon hard times? No, they suck, it's official. Their major upgrades this offseason were signing Octavio Dotel, DJ Carrasco, Ryan Church, Javier Lopez, Bobby Crosby, Akinori Iwamura, and Brendan Donnelly. I'll give them credit for strengthening a very suspect relief corps. I'd have taken any of those relievers in the Phils bullpen. Their offense will once again rank near the bottom though. Even after adding roughly $14M from those signings, the Pirates still look to come in around $40M overall for 2010 (or 3/4 on A-Rod's salary). It's a damn shame they can't develop some young exciting players that would generate a buzz in Pittsburgh to have the fans return and the team be competitive again. They wouldn't have to get rid of players like Aramis Ramirez, Jason Bay, Freddy Sanchez, or Adam LaRoche. Then they could fill in the voids with free agents and break .500 and maybe even make a push for the Wild Card. Hahaha, just kidding, that's not going to be happening. Not with the current management in place. I truly feel bad for the players on this team, because they are in a hopeless situation. Most teams go in cycles, but 17 years of losing baseball is more than that, it's a bad habit that isn't likely to be broken.

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"Hey everybody, we're all gonna get lei'd."
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WSBGMs HoF:
After roughly one week of voting Eric Bruntlett and shockingly Bea Arthur are looking to be the We Should Be GMs class of 2010 Hall of Fame inductees. Don't forget to cast your ballot (located in upper right sidebar).

Name that Player #18

Standings:
Andrew - 5
Preserve Jon - 3
Joseph - 2
Caleb - 2
Mike The Mac Guy - 1
Jstocksazag12 - 1
SJPhilsFan - 1
Roy - 1
Utility Derek - 1

I'd give my left pinky for this dude's 'stache and 'fro. Name that player, do it, do it.

Jose Contreras is a Phillie

Enrique Rojas, of ESPN Deportes, is reporting that 38 year old righy Jose Contreras has signed a 1 year deal with the Phillies. In 7 MLB seasons with Yankees, ChiSox, and Rox, mostly as a starting pitcher, Contreras has a 71-63 record with a 4.61 ERA and 1.37 WHIP. He's set to compete for the 5th spot in the rotation with Grand Pappy Moyer, Kyle Kendrick, and Andrew Carpenter. However, the ever-busy Ruben Amaro Jr. likely sees him slotting into the bullpen as a double-inning capable reliever, much like the now absent Chan Ho Park. If this deal is for less than $2M, then I see it as another positive move made by Rube this offseason. Sure, I would have preferred Jose Valverde or Fernando Rodney, but the money is stretched thin, so you gotta go with what you can afford.

*Of note, this is the second Cuban pitcher landed by the Phils this offseason. Danys Baez being the other.

Figure Skating

Apparently, Charlie Manuel lost a bunch of weight with Nutrisystem. He's feeling so good about his new body he wants to make it to the 2010 Winter Olympics. And with a little help from Cole Hamels, he just might make it.

Multi-Year

Does Ruben Amaro ever rest? Probably, but for only 20 minute power naps. The man is back at it again, this time trying to secure the Phillies arbitration eligible players to multi-year deals.

Joe Blanton is the most expensive of the bunch. He's asking for $10.25M, while the Phils countered with $7.5M. My guess is the 29 year old durable righty could be signed to a 2 year $16M deal similar to the one Joel Pineiro just inked with the Angels. During his time in Philly, Blanton has posted a 16-8 record with a 3rd/4th starter worthy ERA of 4.09. With Kyle Drabek dealt away, there's nobody in the high minors ready to take Blanton's spot.

Kinetic ball of energy Shane Victorino is next on the docket with a proposed salary of $5.8M, Phils offered $4.75. With back-to-back Gold Gloves and continued progress on offense this recently married 29 year old is a good bet for a 3 year deal in the neighborhood of $20M. I love Vic, he's fun to watch, he embodies the Philly style of hard-nosed play. If Vic is locked up, this certainly means the end of Jayson Werth's time here after 2010, because top prospect Dominic Brown will be set to take over one of the outfield spots.

Last, but not least is Chooch. Carlos wants $2.5M, Phils offered $1.7M. Ruiz is good behind the plate. He calls a good game, has a solid relationship with the pitching staff, and for an 8-hole hitting catcher ain't that bad with the stick. He turns 31 tomorrow, but his body seems like it has a handful of decent seasons left in it. This is his first arbitration eligible season, so maybe a 2 or 3 year deal worth roughly $7-8M makes sense. Lou Marson was shipped to Cleveland last summer, so there isn't a heir to the throne readily available in the minors.

Name That Player #17

Standings:
Andrew - 5
Preserve Jon - 3
Joseph - 2
ROY - 2
Mike The Mac Guy - 1
Jstocksazag12 - 1
SJPhilsFan - 1
Utility Derek - 1

This former All-Star played 10 MLB seasons for 8 different teams. His most successful stint was with the Phillies. He's tied to one of the most lopsided trades in MLB history. He has more career rbi than hits. He hails from Jamaica.

Go ahead, name that player.

Name That Player #16

Standings:
Andrew - 4
Preserve Jon - 3
Joseph - 2
Mike The Mac Guy - 1
Jstocksazag12 - 1
ROY - 2
SJPhilsFan - 1
Utility Derek - 1

In one season with the Phillies, this player came in shy of 100 plate appearances while only logging 22 innings in the field between catcher, outfield and first base. Typical for a pinch hitter, I guess. Of course, he only batted about .200. Typical of a Phillies pinch hitter, I guess.

Name That Player!

Victorino Avatar

Thanks to James Cameron and the people of McDonald's' that allowed me to use the software to create a Shane Victorino avatar. He looks like he could have played the lead.
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Durbin Signs:
Chad Durbin became the first Phillie this offseason to sign and avoid arbitration. Shane Victorino, Joe Blanton, and Carlos Ruiz still have to go down that path. Durbin signed for $2.125 for the 2010 season. He's been a workhorse in the bullpen over the past 2 seasons, but the Phils are going to need him to put up numbers closer to his '08 season (2.87 ERA/1.32 WHIP) as opposed to last year (4.39/1.48) because of the lack of depth and health currently in relief.

Jose Offerman- Dominican Gangster

Phillies fans would like to forget Jose Offerman because of his horrendous 2005 season with the club. The only good thing he did for the Phils was take an errant pickoff throw from LaTroy Hawkins off of his helmet in Chicago that lead to the winning run. Offerman did have some success on the baseball diamond though, as he was able to stick around for 15 seasons and collect 1500+ hits. Of course, he also committed 79 errors at SS in a span of only 2 seasons (only 20 less than Jimmy Rollins has made his entire career). Well, Jose Offerman is back in the news. About 2 and a half years ago he went psycho on pitcher with a bat playing independent ball, and now he's coaching in the Dominican winter league and punched an umpire in the neck. This dude is straight up gangster. Get this guy some counseling.

Create the Caption

"Is that Andre 3000 with the bat?"
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WSBGMs HoF:
Don't forget to cast your ballot for the 2010 We Should Be GMs Hall of Fame (located in the upper right sidebar). Adam Eaton, Eric Bruntlett, Brett Myers, and Bea Arthur of all people appear to be the favorites.

WSBGMs Hall of Fame - Nominations 2010

It’s WSBGMs Hall of Fame time. As a reminder, here is how it works. Each year, Carson and I will nominate a few people (players, coaches, ballgirlz, etc.) that have had an impact on the blog. We'll put the nominations up for vote. If the person receives a certain percentage of the vote (which we will arbitrarily change every year to suit our needs), then he will be officially enshrined in the Hall of Fame, which will be less of a hall and more of a widget in the sidebar. As for the rules: 1) a person can only be nominated three times 2) a person cannot be currently playing/coaching/working for Phils to be nominated 3) a reader can vote for more than one person but we ask that you only vote once and 4) I reserve the right to make up more rules later.

In the inaugural vote, Pat Burrell was elected, Steve Jeltz, Abe Nunez and David Bell remained on the ballot, but Rick Schu only received a few votes so he is no longer eligible.

So without further adieu, here are this year's nominations, in alphabetical order.

Bea Arthur - A long shot to get elected, Bea can smile in Heaven at being the first non-baseball person nominated. She and the rest of the “Golden Girls” helped the Phils to an extended winning streak early in the 2009 season. She made such an impact on the team and this blog that she was given a place next to Bowa and Wade in the banner image. Props to Bea.

David Bell - Oh God, did we hate David Bell. Most of the first year of this blog was spent pointing out all the negative aspects of David Bell's game. Our hate was complete...and completely out of proportion to his play. He wasn't that bad and suffered from injuries that hurt his numbers, but we weren't about to give him the benefit of the doubt or let facts get in the way of some good complaining. Carson once wrote, "If you like David Bell, then you might like Coldplay and gerbling." That pretty much sums it up.

Eric Bruntlett - Is there any other place on the internet that celebrates failure that way we do? We spend at least half of our time complaining about the worst players on the team and in the last two years, that player was Eric Bruntlett. Besides scoring the winning run in the World Series and turning and unassisted triple play, he didn't do anything noteworthy. He didn't get arrested. He didn't cause problems for the team with a poor attitude. He didn't say crazy things to the media. It seems he just went about his business like a professional ballplayer should. He just sucked at actually playing baseball and I'm estimating we got at least 50 blog posts dedicated to that fact alone. So, thanks for that Eric Bruntlett, here's your nomination. Oh yeah, and he had a pretty cool beard that made it into our title banner.

Adam Eaton -The Phillies drafted Eaton 11th overall in 1996. I wish their association with his failures ended there, but sadly he returned to the Phillies in 2007. The Phillies paid Eaton about $24 million and in turn he posted a 14-18 record with a 6.10 ERA. He became the most hated pitcher on this blog (I think Carson even fantasized about beating him up in a parking garage...) and forever will be the standard bearer for disappointing pitching performances. Of course, it also didn't help Eaton's case here that he often didn't think he was pitching that bad, denying his supreme shittyness to the end. When he mercifully left Philadelphia he had this to say, "Granted, there were a lot of horrible games in there, but there were some good ones, too." No, Adam, there weren't, that's why you're getting a HoF nomination.

Steve Jeltz - Jeltz is not just another jheri-curled, light-hitting middle infielder, he is the embodiment of the Phillies that Carson and I grew up watching. Sure, Mike Schmidt was the face of the franchise, but Mike Schmidt was good. Hell, he was great. The Phillies were not, however. They sucked. But we loved them anyway. So when I think of the Phils of the late 80's and early 90's, I think of Juan Samuel's unorthodox throws to first, Von Hayes' batter's box spanning stance, and Rich Schu's mustache. I think of Steve Jeltz's jheri curl. So, when we decided to create an outlet for our 25 years of Phillies frustration, naturally the first player pictured was Steve Jeltz. And ever since, he's been our go-to guy.

Brett Myers – Here is a rough timeline of Brett’s career with the Phillies - #1 draft pick who was a good starter, then he became a reliever, he got kind of fat, then he asked somebody how to spell “retard,” then he beat his wife in Boston, at some point he pitched the last inning of a playoff clinching game, then he became a starter again, he became less fat, also at some point he got a horrible tattoo on his wrist, then he hurt is hip and finally he became a free agent. I don’t know about you, but that seems pretty HoF worthy to me.

Abraham Nunez - When we weren't complaining about David Bell, we were complaining about Abe "No-hit" Nunez. The argument against Nunez was simple: he was never any good, the Phils gave him too much money, he was the worst hitter in all of baseball, and yet he continued to get playing time. I'm getting angry just reminiscing about Nunez.

Ed Wade – Wade, along with fellow incompetent Keystone state GM Cam Bonifay, was the primary inspiration for starting this blog. Due to his epic failings, and despite his absence, he continues to be a frequent topic. He remains the model of GM ineptitude that WSBGMs strives to rage against. An inspiration. A failure. A WSBGMs HoF nominee.

The poll is located on the right sidebar towards the top. Remember, you can vote for more than one player. Winners will be announced later, whenever I decide enough votes are in, the hanging chads are pulled, and I get time to make the sidebar widget for the winner.

Thanks for voting.

Our Hero- A Motion Picture

This is my directorial debut. Star- Chase Utley.

It may take a minute or so to load, but hopefully you find it worth the wait. It's in Swedish, but has English subtitles. Enjoy.

Phillies Cartoons

Through my scouring on the Internet for Phillies related images, I've formed a collection of cartoons. Thanks to all the sketch artists that allowed me to use your artwork without permission.