Tuesday, June 15, 2010

In Depth NYY/Philly Series Preview

Venue: Stupid Stadium in that Stupid City
Good Guys: Philadelphia Phillies 32-29, 3rd Place
Bad Guys: New York Yankes 40-23, 1st Place

Game 1: CC Sabathia vs. Roy Halladay
(6-3, 4.01/1.22) (8-4, 1.96/1.02)
Reason the Yanks Wins: CC accidentally strolls into the visiting clubhouse and eats half the Phillies roster thinking they were part of the pregame spread, leaving Manuel no choice but to forfeit.
Reason the Phils Win: DH Ben Francisco hits for the cycle driving in all 6 of the Phillies runs, and Doc pitches a complete game shutout naturally.

Game 2: AJ Burnett vs. Kyle Kendrick
(6-4, 3.86/1.33) (3-2, 4.80/1.37)
Reason the Yanks Win: Derek Jeter causes dissension among the Phillies wives and girlfriends by treating them all to a night of clubbing and debauchery, leading to a massive cat-fight in the Phils family section which spills over onto the field and ends in ejections of over half of the Phils roster...the half CC didn't devour the day before.
Reason the Phils Win: Utley and Howard blast 5 longballs between the two of them, and KK pitches a complete game shutout naturally.

Game 3: Andy Pettitte vs. Jamie Moyer
(8-1, 2.46/1.10) (6-6, 5.03/1.20)
Reason the Yanks Win: No more funny business, the Yankees are the better team...ouch.
Reason the Phils Win: Werth lines one up the middle off of Pettitte's huge schnoz leading to an explosion of runs, and Grand Pappy pitches a complete game shutout naturally.