Friday, May 07, 2010

In Depth Philly/Atlanta Series Preview

Venue: Building @ corner of Broad & Pattison
Good Guys: Philadelphia Phillies 17-11 1st Place
Bad Guys: Atlanta Braves 12-16 5th Place

Game 1: Derek Lowe vs. Jamie Moyer
(4-2, 5.18/1.52) (3-2, 5.70/1.33)
Reason the Braves Win: Ryan Howard commits a Double Howard in the same game, which leads to 9 unearned runs and his 2 homeruns were only solo jacks.
Reason the Phillies Win: Chipper Jones decides to take the game off to nurse one of his various injuries (infected naval, ingrown toenail, anal fissures, dandruff, chicken pox, male pattern balding, impacted molars, dry eyes, acute hearing loss, lacerated earlobe, etc.).

Game 2: Kris Medlen vs. Joe Blanton
(1-1, 2.55/1.08) (0-1, 5.40/1.65)
Reason the Braves Win: Kentucky Joe loves him some barbecue, and Bobby Cox being the ol' wily bastard he is bribes Joe into throwing the game for a rack of ribs and a side of slaw next time the Phils are in Atlanta.
Reason the Phillies Win: It's Medlen's first start of the year, taking DL'd Jair Jurrjens' spot in the rotation. Career ERA as a reliever- 3.22, as a starter- 6.38, he's screwed!

Game 3: Kensin Kawakami vs. Cole Hamels
(0-5, 5.47/1.48) (2-2, 4.42/1.44)
Reason the Braves Win: Kawakami throws no-hitter in honor of Japan's opening ceremonies of their Grand Sumo Tournament. Hurry, tickets are still available in the price range of 2100-8200 Yen.
Reason the Phillies Win: It's Motrin IB Mother's Appreciation Day at the ball park and Hamels is a momma's boy.

9 comments:

GM-Carson said...

Jayson Werth with The Howard in yesterday's win. That's 3 Howards by Phils players in only a little over a month. Last year only 1 Howard was committed by the team- Chase Utley.

Dr. Steve said...

And to think, Werth fought for that change, not for Halladay's ERA, not to stop Pujols (was it him?) from getting charged with a triple, no. It was so HE WOULD GET A HOWARD!

What a man!

Preserve Jon said...

Bill Lyon's quote of what Robin Roberts told Cole Hamels during the playoffs last year is golden, grandfatherly, and downright classy.

"Hey lefthander," he said, "just don't forget how good you are."

Words are important.

Bob D said...

David Freese had that triple/error not Pujols.

Bloodstripes said...

It takes a special player to register a Howard. Can't be MVP without one.

Congratulations to golden arm grand daddy Moyer for being the oldest chap ever to throw a shutout.

Go the fightin' Phils!!

GM-Carson said...

I honestly can't believe Grand Pappy just tossed a 2-hit shutout. I'm in awe.

ripjgarcia said...

For real? 0 walks.. 2 hits.. CG.. Jamie Moyer.. get the fuck out

ripjgarcia said...

oh yeah.. 105 pitches.. sheesh. go old man.

GM-Carson said...

I think I need to write an apology letter to Jamie.