It's a gosh darn shame Dave Coggin isn't still in Phillies pinstripes these days, as "Coggin's Noggins" would be the perfect fan group for him. Just imagine a bunch of bozos sitting in the right field upperdeck bleachers of the Brick Cit House with SNL coneheads on...ah, beautiful! In 3 seasons with the Phils (2000-2002), the former 1st round pick of 1995 (30th overall) pitched in 60 games, starting 29, with a 10-12 record and a 4.52 era over 199 innings. On second thought, I'm kinda glad he's not still a Phillie. For what it's worth, he sucked at the plate too, going an abysmal 2-48 (.042) during his career. After life in Philly he went on to be released by the Colorado Rockies, Tampa Bay Devil Rays, and Atlanta Braves organizations without ever making it back to the majors. His Wikipedia page blows, offering only this tidbit- "Dave Coggin lives with his wife Joanna and their golden retriever in Rancho Cucamonga, California." Like I give a crap.
*I'm proud to announce Ryan Howard will be credited with the first "Howard" of the spring. The "Howard" is a stat WSBGM's will be tracking this season, and it's anytime a player hits a homerun, commits an error, and strikes out all in the same game. Watch for a "Howard" stat tracker atop one of the sidebars come regular season.
*Rodrigo Lopez has signed a minor league contract with the Phils. The Phillies must really like this guy, as it was rumored that he was the trade chip Baltimore would have sent us in the nixed Pat Burrell trade of 2006 (the year he lost 18 games). Rod-Lop hasn't pitched in the majors since 2007, and owns a career record of 65-65 over 1016.7 ip with a 4.80 era and 1.41 whip in 7 MLB seasons with the Padres, O's, and Rox. If healthy, he's actually not horrible, and he's only 33 years old.
*Kyle Kendrick and Antonio Bastardo got lit up like the night sky on the 4th of July by Team USA yesterday, giving up 4 and 5 runs a piece over 5 total innings (including 4 homers). The Phils ended up losing 9-6, with Jason Donald, Ryan Howard, Lou Marson, and Marcus Giles having solid games at the plate. Later Rich Dubee had this to say about KK- "I haven't been evaluating yet, but the race is on now. I would have liked to have seen a little more improvement, but again, it's early. He still needs better body language. He still needs a better presence, I'd say. It looked a little frail at times. Again, that chopped base hit, that's life to a sinker ball guy and has to understand that. When you're throwing your arms like, 'Why me?' or whatever he's throwing them up for, that's showing the other team there that you're scuffling. And you don't ever want to let your guard down. You don't want to show how you might be feeling poorly or whatever." This is after baby Kyle threw his arms up twice in disgust yesterday.
*Adam Eaton had some things to say about his time with the Phillies- "What went wrong? A lot of things went wrong, but a lot of things that went right, too. I helped them get to the playoffs two years in a row, and obviously we won the World Series last year. That's a big thrill of mine, but obviously I still want to compete in that World Series atmosphere. That's what I aim to do. It's bitter for the fact that i wasn't able to compete in it, but sweet in the fact that I watched those guys perform the way they did at such a high level at the right time. It's a huge sense of pride in being a part of that." What a douche! Does he seriously think he helped the team to the playoffs both seasons? He's r-tard numero uno if that's what he believes, because the only thing he helped do was give fans ulcers, high blood pressure, and astronomical booze bills.