In the likes of the time-tested marketing scheme of Amazon.com, I bring to you- "If you like (blank), then try (blank)" Phillies style.
If you like 12-10 scores, then try watching the NFL.
If you like Ryan Howard's swing, also try a cool summer breeze.
If you like Chris Coste's life story, then I recommend Walt Disney Pictures.
If you like Pat Burrell, you might enjoy Rick James and Skoal.
If you like David Bell, then you might like Coldplay and gerbling.
If you like Joe Blanton, then try Adam Eaton, or Brett Myers, or losing.
If you like the Phillies, then try open heart surgery.
If you like Manny Ramirez to Philadelphia rumors as the truth, then you might like Greek mythology.
If you like Pat Gillick, also try Ed Wade.
If you like Charlie Manuel, you might enjoy Jeff Foxworthy jokes.
If you like Shane Victorino, then try a double-shot espresso, Jolt Cola, or Red Bull.
If you like the Mets, you'll most likely also enjoy poverty, war, health care crisis, recession...basically anything else that is plaguing this great country.
*Feel free to add your own in the comments section.
Adam Eaton to the minors should be a cause for a mini-celebration. However, stop and think about all the millions Pat Gillick has wasted on a bunch of no-talent ass-clowns. Eaton is only the posterboy for foolish investments on Patty G's behalf, there have been plenty others. Aside from Eaton (15.2 million over 07-08), Gillick has unwisely splurged on Tom Gordon (12.5 over 07-08), Ryan Franklin (2.6 in '06), Rod Barajas (2.5 in '07) , Geoff Jenkins (5 in '08), Brett Myers (8.6 in '08), Abraham Nunez (3.2 over 06-07), Wes Helms (4.7 over 07-08), Freddy Garcia (10 in '07), Arthur Rhodes (3.7 in '06), and the 22 million sent to the ChiSox with Jim Thome. This list doesn't include players that sucked that flew in under the 1 million dollar threshold- Alex Gonzalez, Sal Fasano, Julio Santana, Antonio Alfonseca, among others. Total wasted money: 90 million dollars. Think that's bad? Just wait until Gillick's lapdog Ruben Amaro Jr. takes over at season's end.
The Mets still lead the NL East, but the Phils are only half a game back and the Marlins 1 game back. The Mets and Marlins are busy beating each other up, so it's time for the Phils to make a move. The gNats are next on the schedule with headcase Brett Myers (3-9, 5.82 era, 1.57 whip) facing rookie Collin Balestar (1-2, 5.75, 1.48) at new Nationals Park tonight to open the series. Tomorrow- Grand Pappy Moyer (9-6, 3.76, 1.32) vs. the unhittable Tim Redding (7-5, 3.98, 1.33 overall/2-0, 0.00, .170 average against when facing the Phils this season). Series wraps up Thursday night with Mr. Win Kyle Kendrick (8-5, 4.70, 1.50) squaring off against hand-breaker John Lannan (6-10, 3.33, 1.29). The Phils need a series win, or better yet a sweep, and Washington sucks, so that shouldn't be out of the question.