Sunday, June 22, 2008

Where's Phillies?

Carson asked yesterday to "Let my people go." Well, I think "our people" left a week ago, and I'd like to find them, because the slop that has taken the field lately doesn't resemble the Phillies of last month in any way.

I feel like going nuts in a crazed rant about the impotent offense, the lackluster pitching, the complete worthlessness of So Taguchi...but I'm not going to. What everyone (the Phillies, the bloggers, the fans) needs now is a holiday...a vacation from the grind and push of the old reset button.

Also, there's no need to panic yet. Sure, things are tough right now and the Phils have some weaknesses that need to be addressed, but let's all try for one day to act like St. Louis Cardinals fans and be happy about what we have. The Phils are eight games over .500 and are still in first. Those are good things. Of course, if you can't think like this, at least act like a Florida Marlins fan and be completely ambivalent for one day or be like a Tampa Rays fan and forget there is even a team in your city. Think of this as Mental Health Monday...

To help you distract yourself from the crapfest that is the Phillies right now, I've created a little "Where's Phillies" game. In the picture below you have to find Howard, Utley, Rollins, Burrell, Dobbs, Hamels, Jenkins, Myers, Victorino, Werth and Waldo. Enjoy.

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More Distraction
In honor of deceased comedian George Carlin, here is a link to Carlin's famous baseball/football routine. [If the link doesn't work, go here for the Youtube clip.]Enjoy.

Corey

22 comments:

GM-Carson said...

R.I.P. George Carlin- one of the funniest in your face comedians I ever witnessed.

GM-Carson said...

So Taguchi should just be released. I know he's Burrell's pinch-runner/defensive replacement, but Chris Snelling or even TJ Bohn could do that. Taguchi is now 0-13 as a pinch-hitter, un-f'n-believable!

C.M.R. said...

George Carlin was one of the most important figures of all time, and he will be greatly missed. Those tards cursing into the mic on the stand-up stage like first graders who just learned curse words for the first time could learn a thing or two from him.

And yeah, Taguchi should be traded or released, and the only reason he was even signed here is because we thought he would be Iguchi. But yeah, Iguchi he is not.

bsg said...

How about find the a-hole scheduler who has the phillies play 4 A.L. teams in a row, i like interleague play but this is f'n crazy, and am i wrong or do all the teams play 4 I.L. games in a row, thats f'n B.S. now if the philles won those first 2 series maybe i wouldn't be bitching.......

furiousBall said...

seriously, where is our team. great post boys

Bob D said...

I can't find Waldo, I thought that bum on the left was Cholly but he wasn't listed.

We want Snelling! We want Snelling! We want Snelling! We want Snelling! We want Snelling! We want Snelling! We want Snelling! We want Snelling! We want Snelling! We want Snelling! We want Snelling! We want Snelling! We want Snelling! We want Snelling! We want Snelling!

GreggyD said...

I wish I could be ambivalent and not care about this team like a Marlins fan, but it's impossible. All I ask is that this team consistently take 2 out of 3 and play around .600 baseball. They have the potential to do that, but they just forget how to score runs. With Utley, Rollins, Burrell all heading back to their home state, maybe they'll kick start the offense. It just pisses me off that I have to keep looking for reasons as to why this team will break out of their slump.

C.M.R. said...

you and me both, duder.

SirAlden said...

Good pitching beats good hitting.

We need some more good pitching.

R.I.P George Carlin you wielded
words like a sword of truth
smiting all blowhards that passed
before you.

Thank you George.

SirAlden said...

Snelling may be out for the year with an ACL tear.

ripjgarcia said...

I read this about Snelling too. I also just picked up on the New York Post's Bill Sherman saying we were looking to deal to the Rockies for reliever Brian Fuentes. Only problem with his report is said (as a response to this report from a fan wrote) it would be for 22 yr old RHP Fabio Castro. The fan in question pointed out the Fabio is left-handed and 23. Rumors.. rumors.. rumors..

Bob D said...

Ugh, yeah I forgot they DL'ed him. Now we are stuck with the outfield version of "No-Hit" Taguchi. Maybe that is why the Phils have inquired about Ryan Freel.

TJ Bohn is OK also, nothing exceptional but OK. Roster wise only Taguchi and Ruiz have been lacking at the plate. (Sorry - Howard with 19Hrs, and 63RBIs doesn't count as lacking) However Dobbs and Coste have been awesome.

GreggyD said...

19 HR's and 63 RBIs may not count as lacking in your book, but do almost 110 strikeouts and a .220 average with more than 2 weeks left in June count? He nearly has twice as many strikeouts as he does total hits. That's disgusting.


And on another note, from phillies.com, comes another brilliant fan question. This was sent in by Chris P who resides in Harrisburg. Chris wants to know: "What is the news on Antonio Alfonseca? He was great last year, and could help this year down the stretch."

I don't even have a smart ass remark today. All I can do is sit here and stare at my computer shaking my head at 1. the questions that are picked for this weekly segment and 2. the intelligence of some "fans."

GM-Carson said...

I'm taking a week long 8-5 grad course this week and the professor decided to use the F-bomb in honor of Carlin today...classy.

BloodStripes said...

Come back Phils! Come back.

Here's good news. Felix Hernandez just hit a grand slam homer off Johan Santana. His 2nd career hit. Awesome.

BloodStripes said...

Forget about walking a pitcher. Johan just served up a plate full of salami!

hahahhahahaha!!

GM-Carson said...

Wow, a grand slam to a pitcher is brutal. Reminds me of the game Robert Person went deep twice at the Vet, I believe one was a grand slam.

GM-Carson said...

Courtesy of Wikipedia-
Person's most memorable feat came with the Philadelphia Phillies on June 2, 2002, when he hit two home runs in one game against the Montreal Expos. The first home run was a grand slam to left field off Masato Yoshii with two outs in the first inning; the second was a three-run home run to left field off Bruce Chen with one out in the fifth inning. In between those home runs, he came up again with the bases loaded and drove a ball far enough for a second slam, but it was foul and he ended up striking out.

BloodStripes said...

Thats huge.

Joe Blanton in Oakland tomorrow. Maybe Joe can help kick start the Phillies. New day, new series. Phils to get back on track.

C.M.R. said...

robert person is definitely "where are they now?" material

where is he now?

GM-Carson said...

I just traded for Blanton in the WSBGM's Phantasy League so naturally he'll get shelled tonight by the Phils...and I'm ok with that.

GM-Carson said...

Hot Rumor- The New York Post's Joel Sherman reports the Philadelphia Phillies indicated they would trade 22-year-old P Fabio Castro in a deal to acquire Colorado Rockies CL Brian Fuentes, which makes them the early frontrunners to get him.

*Fuentes is good, but our bullpen is already good. We need a starting pitcher!