Yesterday WSBGM's had a compound of the minds; Carson & Corey viewed the 8-2 thrashing of the Philadelphia Phillies at the hands of the Cincinnati Reds together. Here is what transpired...
12:00 - Time for baseball, alcohol, and vittles.
12:13 - Jalapeno chips, an Italian sub, and Mexican cervesas are a top-of-the-line lunch menu.
1:00 - Carson is introduced to the world of Major League Baseball in high definition television...there's no going back now.
1:17 - Edison Volquez's pitches have more movement than a kindergartner jacked up on Red Bull and Skittles.
1:30 - Ken Griffey makes Corey a happy man as he strokes #594, but only in the WSBGM Phantasy League, not in terms of the Phillies.
1:38 - Corey steers Carson away from the beer and towards a delicious mixed drink concoction of Captain Morgan's Tattoo and Coke; never has 70 proof tasted so good.
1:56 - Glad Corey turned Carson on to hard liquor as Jeff Keppinger went deep and the pain is hardly felt.
2:00 - Genius baseball analysts Carson & Corey begin dissecting Brett Myers' outing and come to the forgone conclusion that he's simply not all that great, in fact is more along the lines of middle-of-the-pack.
2:18 - Corey is now very excited because Corey Patterson and Griffey are having big days at the plate (collectively 4-9 with 3 runs, 1 hr, 1 double, and 3 rbi), but he reminds himself the Phillies are more important than fantasy baseball and slowly sinks into depression.
2:35 - Corey, "When will the Out Machine Feliz wear out his welcome?". Carson, "Wait, that d-bag was once welcomed?".
2:58 - Corey and his wife begin talking about what Mexican food to order for dinner, Carson kindly reminds him that there is a game going on, and Corey responds with, "Really, when did that start?".
3:12 - Discussion of the bullpen begins and then ends quite quickly. It is decided that the bullpen is bad, and could easily be the worst in the NL...really, that only took all of 72 seconds to hash out.
3:20 - After a stirring rendition of "Take Me Out to the Ball Game" Carson & Corey discover their ability to perfectly harmonize despite the lack of formal voice lessons.
3:39 - The Phillies offense is not living up to expectations, as they've only squeaked out 2 runs today. Then again, it's only April folks, no need to get yourself worked up into a tizzy, after all it's a "marathon not a sprint". Corey removes the noose from Carson's neck after that awful cliche.
3:52 - Brad Lidge comes in for the save in his Phillies debut and is successful. Not your typical textbook save by definition, but he did save the Phillies from surrendering double digits to the Reds...listen, we're making our own stats up at this juncture, it's ugly, what do you want from us?
4:08 - The sucky game is over, the Phils suck, the season sucks, but luckily Phans have that humor filled kick ass blog We Should Be GM's to help ease the sting of yet another loss.