Friday, March 07, 2008

Phillies Phlashback Phriday: Jerry Martin

With phenomenal 1st base coach Davey Lopes out because of prostate cancer surgery the Phils have turned to former outfielder Jerry Martin to fill the void (guess Vic and J-Roll are temporarily Jerry's Kids). Hopefully Lopes heals quickly and returns to the diamond because he did a tremendous job working with Phillies baserunners last season. However, Jerry may have some tricks up his sleeve too, or possibly cocaine. See, Martin was busted with his Kansas City Royals teammates Vida Blue, Willie Wilson, and Willie Aikens (Clay's dad) back in October of 1983 for possession of the "nose candy" and actually served a 90 day jail sentence while being suspended for part of the '84 season. Naturally this is the go to guy in Lopes' absence, as he can slip some of the powder to the runners to help them get a better jump...pure genius! The Phils aren't the only ones to employ this strategy, why else do you think the Mets brought Darryl Strawberry back. And this goes back to the age old question- what are the baselines really lined with?

Jerry is the son of former Reds pitcher Barney Martin, although Barney only pitched in 1 game for 2 innings (that's not even a cup of coffee, that's an espresso) back in 1953. Back to Jerry, he was signed as an amateur free agent in 1971 by the Phillies and played outfield for them from 1974-78. He later went on to Chicago with the Cubs, San Fran, Kansas City, and New York with the Mets. All in all, 11 seasons in the majors accumulating 666 hits (evil!) for a .251 average but nothing really spectacular besides his ability to snort coke. Carry on my wayward son, there'll be peace when you are done!


Spring Hits:
*The competition for the 5th spot in the rotation is fierce. Adam Eaton is doing his best to make sure he's not the man chosen pacing the Grapefruit League with a tidy 15.75 era. Dos Durbins aren't picking up the slack either, JD- 7.50 and Chad- 7.20; we're in trouble! Then there is the Aussie Rule V pick Travis Blackley who has yet to allow a run, but I'm quick to remind myself it is only spring training after all. Eaton has yet another excuse for his lovely performance- back pain...more like pain in my ass!

*Besides Blackley, there are some other Phillies chuckin' well down in Florida: Jamie Moyer, Brett Myers, Carlos Carrasco, Joe Bisenius, and Francisco Rosario. All probably figure into the Phils plans sometime during the '08 season.

*The .400+ batting average club: Ryan Howard, Eric Bruntlett, Carlos Ruiz, Greg Golson, and Casey Smith. Some of these guys don't even matter, so don't get too excited.

*The sub .200 batting average club: Jimmy Rollins, Jayson Werth, Jason Jaramillo, Ray Olmedo, Pete LaForest, Pat Burrell, TJ Bohn, and Valentino Pascucci. Some of those guys are regulars and better get the motors running.



BloodStripes said...

Put Eaton on the DL for life and bring on the Aussie rule 5!

Get well soon Davey Lopes.

GM-Carson said...

Eaton is a disgusting diaster. This will be a deal that always plagues Pat Gillick's tenure as Phillies GM.

BloodStripes said...

Its first class bollocks! No wonder Hamels is spewing. We should cut him some slack. Eaton will go down in history with Ronald Biggs. What a heist.Multi millionaire minor leaguer. Phooey!

GM-Carson said...

What makes me hate Eaton even more is the countless lame excuses he breaks out. My stuff is good, they just hit it. My arm hurts (no evidence of damage in MRI though). My back hurts...suck it up pussy!

BloodStripes said...

I was surprised to read about another excuse. He needs to own up and get it together. Although I do agree about his stuff. It is good. Good to hit!.......and hard!

Bob D said...

Lets have blood stripes throw a few innings, if he can have an ERA under 6 we will be better off. What do those guys throw down under? boomer-rangs?

Throw outside, so it hits LoDuca on the way back to the mound.

BloodStripes said...

Boomerangs are it GM. Straight back up the box for easy outs. Whiff-mania! Just put Chooch in the field cause you won't need a catcher. 60 MPH mayhem. I'm warm and ready to go. I just need a green card.

BloodStripes said...

That should read...."GM Bob".

Eaton sucking is good. I wanna see Blackley get the job. Boomerang Blackley!........all finesse.

GM-Carson said...

Even if Blackley doesn't get the 5th spot in the rotation the Phils may keep him for the bullpen seeing that he's a lefty (althought he's not particulary hard on them).

BloodStripes said...

I hope they keep him. Phils could do with another loogy. He may not have hardcore heat but he seems to have good control. Put me down as a fan of the Boomerang. One thing is for certain, if shelled he knows how to bounce back. Ha!

Joe said...

Nice to see Howard in a groove early.
I think he learned how NOT to spend an off season last year and ended up hurt/delayed. Ah maturity.

The thing about Eaton that kills me is his (perceived) lack of heart.
Now, I'm inferring things from a great distance but there's nothing in his actions, statements ("a lot of guys are overpaid") and performance (back pain? C'mon) that give me hope.

He even returns to camp with the same doughy face that tells me he's not in shape. Maybe a source of back pain? He's a cautionary tale in pinstripes.

Here's a conversation between Eaton's agent and Adam (to paraphrase Superbad).

AGENT: You know that guy a GM signs for way too much $, sucks, and the GM never lives down the mistake.
AE: Yeah!
AGENT: You could be that mistake!

furiousBall said...

you know LaForest is French for "the forest"

BloodStripes said...


Lala will make a good Iron Pig.

I was given a case of Budweiser today. Its almost gone. Shame I can't get any Yuengling down here.

I'm going to explode...I've had it.

GM-Carson said...

BloodStripes- are you pretty much toasted then?

Joe- nice SuperBad reference.

It's popping on here today, 'bout time!

BloodStripes said...

Toast mate. Burnt toast. Crankin' the old favorite punk songs tonight. Good fun. Past 2am now. My final comment.

I play in a winter baseball league down here. Pre-season training in 8hrs. I'm getting my Pat Burrell preperations in. Primed and ready to go. If it wasn't for baseball I think I'd try suicide.

Mike said...

"And this goes back to the age old question- what are the baselines really lined with?"
Nicely done.

LaForest was my favorite player when he was on the Flyers, but he isn't much of a baseball player.

GM-Carson said...

BloodStripes is gonna have one helluva hangover.

Seriously though, Davey Lopes meant alot to the Phils last season and I wish him a speedy recovery regardless if he decides to return or not, but here's to hoping he does.

Scotty said...

I think they should bring Dickie Thon back to coach first base. I would love to hear Harry say Dickie Thon over and over on the Phillies Broadcasts. That name never gets old. The Phils should make him get his whole name on the back of his jersey too.

Scotty said...

The best thing about Dickie Thon's name is that is sounds like a Jenna Jameson gangbang flick.

Jenna Jameson starring in Dickiethon 7. It has a nice ring to it

GM-Carson said...

Scotty- you need to see a therapist about that porn addiction of yours. :)

GM-Carson said...

Phillies look like shit this spring so far. Today they lost to the Rays 9-1. I know it's only spring, but the offense sucks so far and pitchers are give up tons of runs. Hamels and Carrasco got rocked today, and to only score 1 run off of Tampa Bay pitching is poor. For all this popping off at the mouth Hamels has done about his contract he's not even pitching like he's worth 500K right now.

BloodStripes said...

The Phils are just warming up.

GreggyD said...

Warming up for another FANTASTIC April?

BloodStripes said...

Yeah. Hopefully they can warm up a bit quicker this year.