Friday, April 27, 2007

Promote and Demote

Promote- Fabio Castro. The Legend & Lore of Thee Model Dictator is set to return to the City of Brotherly Love. We desperately need a lefty in the 'pen that can throw strikes and get batters out with more regularity than someone who has been on a 3-day cheese eating binge.

Demote- Matt Smith. The Ace of Walks struggles have been well documented on this blog. I truly hope he goes to Ottawa, works on his pitching mechanics, rediscovers his release point, and finds his way back to Philly because he does have decent pitches, just no control over them right now.

Promote- Chris Coste. Look at this goofy North Dakotan. We need a a respectable backup catcher to compliment Chooch Ruiz, and one that batted .328 as a rookie would seem like a perfect fit to me. Then again, I'm only a self-proclaimed GM, Patty G makes the real decisions unfortunately. How much longer must we wait for our Disney trademarked boy to make his return to the Bigs?

Demote- Rod Barajas. Mr. Anti-Hit is batting a buck-sixty with an Abe Nunez-like .504 OPS. Why the hell did we sign this guy again? Oh yeah, Gillick is a top-notch talent evaluator, much like Wheeler is a Hall-of-Fame bound broadcaster...spare me!

Demote- Abe Nunez aka No-Hit Nunez or Bag-of-Crap-Nuni (that's a new one). This man gets less hits than a hand of 21 in a game of blackjack. Then again, Manuel would probably split and hit that...he's not very good with numbers.

Promote- Pie Guy. Everyone loves Tomas Perez, because everyone loves to get white creamy stuff splattered all over their face...wait, what?

Don't push me, 'cuz I'm close to the edge. I'm trying not to lose my head.

~Carson

29 comments:

Skeeter said...

Demote: Charlie Manuel
Promote: I don't give a shit...a dyslexic, blind 4th grader could probably manage a team better.

GM-Carson said...

Demote: Dick-Dick Dubee
Promote: Jamie Moyer to player/coach status, and kick in a bonus for him.

Bob D said...

That is exactly what needs to be done. If Pat G needs to eat some salary on Barajas and the other no-hit wonder Nunez then do so! Ruiz is doing great so far and Coste can come in and be the backup with Werth the 3rd catcher. Don't forget Jaramillo is just a call away if needed. Nunez is of no help, even a career minor leaguer would be better and have better potential.
A new middle IF as a backup and Coste would improve the bench alot thus improving the team for the rest of the season - forget contracts and how good they were 2 years ago. Cut the dead wood and move on.

GM-Carson said...

Corey and I were talking about Bag-of-Crap-Nuni last night. We need someone who can play short or 2nd, and he's the only one on the current 25 man roster. Thurston is in Ottawa, but I don't think he can handle SS. Basically were screwed with him as our futility infielder. I still can't believe he got a 2-year multi-million dollar contract...Pat Gillick sucks!

Jacobin said...

Bob Ford in today's Inquirer has a piece about Hamels' numbers in day games versus night games. This paragraph sums up the issue:

In his career, Hamels has a 2.70 earned run average in night starts and a 5.92 ERA in day starts. This season (admittedly only five games old for Hamels), he has a league-leading 0.56 ERA at night and a 5.71 ERA during the day.

Hamels only has 28 career starts in the majors. The numbers might not mean anything, but I thought it was interesting. Even if Hamels change-up is easier to pick up during the day, it doesn't explain the Phils' offense taking a shit yesterday!

Dave Kingman said...

Carson, agreed. They need to lock up Moyer as a pitching coach before some other team like Seattle grabs him after next season as their pitching coach.

GM-Carson said...

Jacob- those are some stunning stats. Small sample size yes, but there's a "difference of night and day" there...hahaha, I'm so punny!

Good thing Hamels doesn't pitch for the Cubs, he'd be screwed in half of his starts.

Maria said...

Can't believed you mentioned Tomas Perez. I was justing thinking about the pie in the face thing two days ago.

12-12 in the month isn't too bad either. And Danny Sandoval can play 2nd base.

GM-Carson said...

The Pie Guy, Tomas Perez, is my wife's favorite Philly of all-time. I see him being a coach in the near future. He was in camp with some team this spring but got cut...Phils manager of '08!

BenJah said...

demote: retard managers and clueless gm's
promote: chris coste, for depth at c, 3b AND 1b -- the model dictator, for duuhhh

this phillies and their phans have a lot to look forward to: the team is playing better, and may is national mental health month, as well as national teen pregnancy prevention month.

Bob D said...

national mental health month - Are we allowed to eat donuts during May?

GM-Carson said...

I'm wondering if the Phils even get the game in tonight because of this stupid weather. The cold, snow, rain, and wind have been wreaking havoc thus far this season.

BloodStripes said...

Grandmaster Flash......alright mate!

I'm a big Coste fan. Get him up here quick. Glad to see Fabio is coming up. As for a backup SS or 2B, don't mention it bro. Rollins and Ut are playing 162 games. No injuries, just good health. We need them there all year.

BloodStripes said...

My weather program is saying showers and 60 degrees for tonight. Equal to 16 Centigrade. Thats a winters day at my place. Chilly.

How about they play the game with a rain delay or two. We need a win to get the streak going again.

Come on Phils!!!

GM-Carson said...

BloodStripes- your Aussie-ass never ceases to amaze me. What the hell is a centrigrade? Is it something like Celsius?

I expect a good showing from Fred-Gar tonight.

Bob D said...

Demote Gordon

BloodStripes said...

LOL! Centigrade is = to celcius. Same thing bro. Graduated to a scale of a hundred.

Top win tonight. Good sign to come from behind late in the game. Tom Gordon is well shaky. Scary stuff. J-Roll and Utley awesome clutch homers.

Rowand may not have any shoulders but he has very good eyes and strength in those arms. Top stuff!

Maria said...

Aaron Rowand is unreal right now. I don't ever want to see Tom Gordon in the 9th inning with a 1-3 run lead.

Jacobin said...

Flash ah-ah blown-saviour of the universe Gordon screws up yet another game this year. How long is this going to go on for? And is this reminding anyone of Jose Mesa... not so bad when he first gets here, and then he blows enough games to keep us out of the playoffs in his last year here?

That being said, the offense pulled through! Keep flaying the fish... we gotta get out of this month in better shape than the last two years.

chuckm said...

I have been kinda out of it the last few weeks as I have been in Richmond Va for training for my new job, but WTF is with Manuel? Why is Alfie coming in early innings for a one-out situational instead of closing?...Why is Gordon still closing?...I dont like to bust on Flash as the guy is old and has had a good career, but its obvious to anybody that he hasnt had it since his DL stint last August. If the Phillies did make the playoffs last season, Flash was a Philly Sports Tragedy waiting to happen...serious.

das411 said...

Tomas Perez is currently lurking on the LA Dodgers' AAA team in Las Vegas...if that is not a scary image then I do not know what is...

Glad to see the MD back. Now how long will it be until he has his own fatigues-and-blond-hear-wearing fan club??

BloodStripes said...

Well said Chuckm. Flash has had a good career. No need to trash him ,but yeah, he is a bit sketchy right now. Alf has good stuff so why not have him close. Maybe Myers? But he is still getting into a jam or two. Either way at least we have a couple of options. For now though I reckon Elmer will stick with Gordon. The offense saved him. He lives to close another day.

From USA Today game notes "Phillies reliever Ryan Madson hasn't allowed a run in his last six appearances, spanning 8 2-3 innings". Wow! Keep it up Dog.

Even better "Rowand is batting .448 (26-for-58) with five homers and 10 RBIs during his hitting streak."

BloodStripes said...

Considering Rowand has no shoulders I propose that the WSBGM's blog call him "Long Neck". What do you reckon crew?

Long Neck Rowand. Yeah! The man can hit.

GM-Carson said...

Watching Gordon is painful, he simply can't get the job done consistently any more. He continues to leave pitches hanging over the plate, and the opposition is blasting him. But our dumbass manager will keep him at closer until it's too late to make a change. I'm glad we won, but overall the Phils played crappy last night.

Corey said...

what the hell are you doing up at 6:30 on a saturday morning? you better have a serious hangover headache that is not allowing you to sleep in late...

eaton vs willis tonight. yeah, that's a favorable matchup (crap, i just broke the my sarcasm meter.)

BenJah said...

both of you are up early.......i'm up b/c i have to go to work.

that win was impressive b/c the team showed some heart; something that was seriously lacking in the first couple weeks of the season

GM-Carson said...

Dudes, I was up at 6, and that's "sleeping in" to me. I love to sleep, but I'm not good at staying asleep. Can't wait to see how this pans out once the baby is here.

Corey said...

speaking of sleeping in, in february, i slept for 17 straight hours one day/night. it was like a mini-vacation...

carson, i'm guessing it's going to pan out into less sleep, at least, that's my prediction. stone-cold lock; new baby=less sleep. if i get this one right (it would be three in a row after i predicted a decision in the phillies game and night time darkness), i think i might be the new oracle...

GM-Carson said...

Kiss my ass!