Saturday, April 07, 2007

Hallelujah!

Breaking News- This just in, the Philadelphia Phillies have won a baseball game. Now back to you're regularly scheduled programing.

Just like a pool shark hustling some drunkards in a shady bar, the Phillies were toying with the competition. The opening act was all a ploy to lure the rest of the league into thinking they didn't have what it takes to contend, but now they're ready to bust out the whoppin' stick and serve the unsuspecting bastards with loss after loss, while racking up wins all the way through October. Okay, I may be getting ahead of myself, after all it is only 1 win and they still do have 3 losses, but you can see my optimism hasn't escaped me.

Upbeat Upwellings:
*You're my boy Burrell, you're my boy! Pat is offering "protection" better than the Sopranos, albeit for the first 4 games of the season. Soon we'll be asking, "Who's going to protect Burrell?". After an intentional walk to Ryan Howard, Burrell went Yahtzee on a Ricky Nolasco curveball and promptly delivered it over the rightfield fence for a 3-run bomb. I'm sure there will still be some retarded boo-birds for Burrell when he returns to Philly, and I fully support another 1-finger salute to those nay-sayers if the booing continues.
*Antonio Alfonseca is throwing well, and that's encouraging, as the bullpen NEEDS him. I pose a question though- if fans begin booing Alfonseca, how does he go about flipping them off considering he has no true middle finger?
*Retaining the services of Grand Pappy Moyer is going to prove to be a smart move by Gillick (and he hasn't had many). Moyer tops out at 83 mph, and yet still manages to pitch inside and baffle hitters. How does he do this without getting lit up? He knows how to pitch and mess with a batters' mind. Hamels, Moyer, and others will learn a lot under the tutelage of Moyer, more so than that stoner Dick-Dick Dubee.
*Whenever Michael Bourn comes in as a defensive replacement for Burrell, the Phils are probably sporting the best defensive outfield in baseball. With Bourn in LF, Rowand in CF, and Victorino in RF a flyball doesn't stand a chance like David Bell at a gay bar, both will get eaten alive.
*No offense to Rod Barajas but his offense isn't very good, and Carlos Ruiz should be the starting catcher. I've been saying for quite some time now that this cat can hit, and so far this season he's doing just that. Given the opportunity of regular playing time, Chooch would be an above average catcher with the possibility of becoming an All-Star.
*I predicted 20-30 steals from Shane Victorino this year, and although he's still learning how and when to swipe a bag, looks like he's going to attempt to get at least that many. The man is fast, and with the help of Davey Lopes, should be able to translate that gift of speed into a butt-load of sb's.
*You know things are going well when No-Hit Nunez gets a base knock (now batting .500 on the year).
*Jon Lieber and Freddy Garcia are on the mend. Lieber may join the club as early as Monday with Garcia following for an April 15th start. I guess Donut-Eater heads to the pen with Clay Condrey becoming the odd man out, because Bisenius is being optioned when Francisco Rosario is officially added.

Negative Note- Pittsburgh couldn't keep on their pace to win 162 games, as they fell victim to the Reds last night. This club has the chance to surprise a lot of people this season in the weak NL Central. Their offense should be better with the addition of Adam LaRoche and a full season from Xavier Nady. The rotation continues to mature, and that bullpen has talent.

Well, I don't want to end things on a downer, so here's an inspirational picture to amp you up for today's game.

~Carson

24 comments:

goDuke said...

You're my boy Burrell, You're my boy! Is right. This should be the new 2007 slogan, F 'Goosebumps' That being said Burrell always lights up the Marlins early in the season down there, I remember many early bombs for him down there.

chuckm said...

Good game last night. Awesome that Burrell delivered that game-icer
after Howard was IBB'd and I am very pleased with Choochies hitting. Oh yeah, props to the old man as Moyer did an excellent job. It was almost like he was deliberately allowing Fish on base just so he could get them to feebly pop up or GIDP. One thing was odd was eary mopping up. That should be Madsons job until he can show he deserves better.

GM-Carson said...

Call me crazy, but Madson should only being doing mop up duty, and if he can't succeed there, release his ass!

Reagan316 said...

Somehow people will still boo Burrell. Playa Haters. Keep it up Pat. You're my boy!

Madson sucks bad right now and as shown has been on downward trend since his rookie season. The only place he should be mopping up is in a spank booth.

Jacobin said...

Damn right Pat clubs Marlins pitching in Miami! With all the hotties in the South Beach clubs, you get more play hitting the long ball than you do going 0-4 with three backwards K's!

All kidding aside, I've been pulling for Burrell since they drafted him. I mean, they took him the year after that a$$hole J.D. Drew refused to sign. In a lot of ways, I've wanted Burrell to succeed because he did sign with us and to see him do better than Drew would just be sweet.

Skeeter said...

Sometime in May, me and some of my friends are heading to Citizens Bank and will have a Burrell fan group section in the top bleachers. A big sheet will obviously be with us and something to the effect of "PEOPLE WHO BOO BURRELL ARE ASSHOLES" will be written on it. I'll post more when the date approaches. But anyone who still likes Burrell and wants to shit on the people who don't will be more than welcome to join.

McD said...

Its all about the positive waves. It was great to see Burrell knock that ball into the left field seats after the intentional pass to Howard.

BenJah said...

skeeter: thats awesome!! definately post it here b/c i might want to go and join. thats cool that you live in the city. my g-mom lives in center city and i lived with her one year while i worked at the philly zoo. that's how this phills obsession of mine started, actually: everytime a new team came to town, i went to one of the games. i told myself not to fall in love since the phils are such heartbreakers, but i couldnt help it. i only get to go to 2-3 games a year now.

BloodStripes said...

Can't wait to see Freddy on the mound this year for his first start. A dominating win. Also looking forward to having Leiber back. Hopefully he thinks he has a point to prove and will pitch his ass off for many a zero run inning. We need these 2 healthy and ready to pitch.

Myers tonight. 10 K's please Brett. For the Phils and for my phantasy team. I wanna get back on top of the ladder!

D. Page said...

I agree that people need to shut up about Burrell. There was so much booing at the game I went to it was disgusting. Burrell didn't have a great game, but he wasn't bad, either. It was really stupid.

BloodStripes said...

Can someone answer me this. In the fantasy league. If you have a player who played early and scores you points. Can you bench him so the guy coming in has a chance to score points without losing your original guys points?

michael said...

more people should turn their booing to rowand. the guy has been taking a big shit at the plate recently. so apparently Gillick is taking a look at Hermanson

and to answer your question bloodstripes. no, you can only have one person play that one position for the day.

chuckm said...

re Bloodstripes fantasy question: No. When a player you set in a position starts his game, the position locks for the day.

Maria said...

The Phillies are going to go 159-3.

BloodStripes said...

Thanks Chuckm.

Jacobin said...

J-Roll with an inside the park home run! GO GO GO GO GO GO GO!!! Can I get an AMEN!!! I feel awed.

Willis was looking unbelievable tonight, and all of a sudden the boys are hitting him hard!

furiousBall said...

J-Fuckin' Roll Baby! That was awesome

BloodStripes said...

Phantastic J-Roll. Love that man.

My fantasy teams offense is killing it today. Especially now with J-Rolls superb effort. All I need is Myers to take the win and get a few K's to make up for the D.Baez's ERA of 81.00. Damn.

Anyway, all I care about is a Phightin' Phils win. Let's go!!!

Jacobin said...

Oh, the pain, the horror... ugh. The lead wilts so quickly, and with it the momentum I had on this take-home test I was working on.

Bitches! Flay the fish!

BloodStripes said...

C'mon UT!!!

chuckm said...

Utz and Howard are seriously chumping it in the clutch so far this season. Myers meltdown. Ah well, I'll stay tuned to see how Bisenius does and if Willingham gets the cycle.

Skeeter said...

i google image searched "Ryan Madson" and this picture showed up...

http://i84.photobucket.com/albums/k33/coreyshambaugh/us1.jpg

das411 said...

Seriously, I took Utley, ROllins, and Burrell on my fantasy team and who would've thought the chump who hasn't done anything this first week would be UTLEY? Can't wait until this team actually gets it together...

and you fellas may want to go check out TheGoodPhight.com, they have an interesting post about Madson that pretty much pinpoints exactly when he went from "quality reliever" to "the next Gavin Floyd"...

GM-Carson said...

Honestly, I think I could have swung left-handed and hit Myers last night...he was horrible.

I'm saying it, and I'm not stuttering, so listen up- Ryan Howard and Chase Utley are actually hurting this team right now. I didn't say get rid of them or boo them, or something ridiculous like that. But through the first 5 games of the season they are killing the offense, along with timely k's with runners on my Fence-Face Rowand.