Dear Mother, can't you hear me whining? It's been 3 whole weeks, since I have left your home. This sudden fear has left me trembling, 'cause now it seems that I am out here on my own, and I'm feeling so alone. Pay attention to the cracked streets and the broken homes. Some call it slums some call it nice. I wanna take you through a wasteland I like to call my home...Welcome to paradise!
The Phillies have been in Florida for spring training for 3 weeks now, and that's officially 2 weeks and 5 days too long already. I figure 1 day is enough for fielding and bunting practice along with some jogging followed by 1 day for an exhibition game...then bring on the season! I'm sure it feels like paradise down there basking in the warm Florida sun rays, but up here in PA I'm just getting antsy for some real baseball. Yesterday the Phils played the Ass-tros and ended the game kissing their sisters (sloppily I might add, that's some West Virginia type stuff) with a 6-6 tie. Seems like we can always find some positives and negatives from these games, but bottom line is these stats don't freaking count! Yet I sit here analyzing what bullpen candidate is having the best Grapefruit League showing and monitoring the bench competition...I'm pathetic.
*Frail, delicate, brittle, flimsy, breakable, fragile...What are synonyms for Tom Gordon? He's heading back to Philly for a "routine exam"...oh crap!
*Jimmy Rollins now has 8 walks this spring. Last season he found his power stroke (that sounds dirty) and now if he could learn to be a bit more patient and work the count we could be looking at the leadoff hitter we've always longed for.
*Chris Roberson wins the No-Talent Ass-Clown award as he was optioned to the minors before his challenger Danny Sandoval.
*Michael Bourn has some serious speed, and it won't be long before he's roaming the Phillies outfield and stealing bases with ease.
*Justin Germano and Clay Condrey are both out of minor league options and pitching well thus far this spring. Other teams would be sure to scarf these guys up should they hit the waiver wire, so I'm hoping they can prove their worth and find a niche in the Phils bullpen.
*Lefty Matt Smith looks like Puddle of Mudd's lead singer.