When looking at a team's attributes the typical focus is on power, hitting, defense, starting pitching, and bullpen. One category that seems to be only briefly touched upon is speed/base running. We all know that we have "Wheels" in the broadcast booth, "he likes it middle-in", but we also have a hodgepodge of running styles on this team. Therefore, I've decided to break down the current roster and place them into various transportation groups.
First up are the peglegs- Pat Burrell and Rod Barajas. This group is the station-to-station type that clogs basepaths worse than a huge turd in a toilet. They as a rule need a pinch-runner in late innings when the score is close.
Next group of motoring fools are the monster trucks- Ryan Howard and Aaron Rowand. This group is all about power, as they can get their wheels turning fast enough to crush anybody or anything (fence) that gets in their way. Seriously, what would you do if you were a catcher and Howard was barreling down on you?
In a class by himself is Shane "Flyin' Hawaiian" Victorino, who is aptly portrayed by a helicopter. He hasn't learned the art of stealing bases, but he burns around the bases as fast as an 80's metal guitarist doing a solo jacked up on cocaine and whiskey. Here's to hoping Davy Lopes can help Vic harness that speed and convert it into some steals next season.
This category is the elite, the fast and the furious, the 0-60 mph in 4 seconds, the racecars- Jimmy Rollins and Chase Utley. We all know J-Roll is going to get his fair share of triples and swipe 30-40 bags for us, and I'm thankful for that. Most of you are probably wondering why I would include Chase in this group. Well, he was rated MLB's 2nd best baserunner last season, so I believe that is good enough for me. *Chris Roberson would be filed into this type as well, but I didn't want to insult Rollins and Utley.
Once again, we have a member of the Phillies that gets a mode of transportation all to himself, Carlos "Chooch" Ruiz- the train. I don't know when, where, or why Ruiz got the nickname "Chooch", but I must say it fits him perfectly just like "Pudge" fits Ivan Rodriguez. One thing to know about Ruiz, he runs very well for a catcher.
The last kind of transportation is the plain-jane automobile- Jayson Werth, Chris Coste, and Wes Helms. There is nothing bad nor good about this group. They won't help nor hurt you on the basepaths. Basically they're too slow to be called fast, and too fast to be called slow.
Late Edition: With Skeeter's recommendation, I have included a mode of transportation for our brainiac skipper, Charlie Manuel, and astute announcer, Chris Wheeler...the short bus. Silly R-Tards!
*Abe "No-Hit" Nunez was not placed into a category due to the fact that he's not on base enough to warrant placement.