The Hot Stove isn't very hot right now, and Spring Training is still a few weeks away. What can a Phillies fan do to pass the time? Crunch numbers from all of the "knowledgeable" experts and formulate your own projections...boring! I'd rather get to know the team on a personal level in an informal Q&A session. So, lets open the mailbag and hear what the team has to say in response.
I am a huge Brett Myers fan, and was wondering if he felt his status of staff ace was infringed upon with the acquisition of Freddy Garcia?
~Mike Tyson, Las Vegas
Brett- Freddy and I will battle it out for the privilege to become the #1 starter. I'm not going to beat myself up if I happen to be slotted into the 2 or 3 spot in the rotation. I plan on knocking the opposition out no matter what day I pitch. Also, look for improved swings from me at the plate this season, as I've been practicing the art of hitting.
I'm a fixture in the left field seats at Citizen's Bank Park, and was glad to see the Phillies keep Pat Burrell. What type of season can we expect from our resident hunk?
~Hauttie Whorinski, Twin Peaks
Pat- I can't wait until the warm weather rolls in and the ladies are screaming my name while jumping up and down in their itty-bitty tank tops. (Drag) I love baseball, I love women, I love partying, and I love booze (exhale). Wait, what the hell was the question again (hiccup, burp)?
As a paraplegic athlete, which consequently means I'm always an underdog, I was speculating how that no-talent ass-clown Danny Sandoval must feel.
~Eturnully Handecapt, Mount Olympus
Danny- First off, I do not appreciate the pseudonym that you have bestowed upon me. I am a top-notch prospect that will one day be an All-Star and batting champion. My future seems grim with the Phillies because I'm currently blocked by lesser ability players in the form of Jimmy Rollins and Chase Utley. A far superior organization will see the "diamond in the rough" that I am and make a trade for me...then watch me blossom!
I'm glad to see Charlie Manuel back for the 2007 season. The man is a great in-game strategist and eloquent speaker. What does he see the team being able to do this season?
~Hugh Dumass, Podunk Falls
Charlie- Well, uh, I think we got a pretty durn good shot. We, uh, just gotta score more runs than the other teams. I will miss the clubhouse presence of David Bell and Arthur Rhodes, but we just need to keep on truckin'. We gonna put a hurtin' on the league, uh, we just need to do what we do and, uh, take it game by game, and, uh, relax, and, uh, trust ourselves, and, uh well you know, win.
What are the chances that our Model Dictator, Fabio Castro, makes the squad this year?
~Javier Juan Julio Rodriguez Santiago Ramirez, Cuba
Fabio- Apesadumbrado, no puedo hablar inglÃes.