Friday, November 10, 2006

Saturday Poll

It's prime season for the Hot Stove right now. I'm so excited I'm practically "dripping with fervor." I have so much fervor, it's disgusting. So much so, that I must take a break from anxiously awaiting the impending signing of another useless utility infielder. Move over Abe Nunez, it's Mark DeRosa's turn... Therefore, today's post is completely Hot Stove unrelated. If you were looking for uninformed, useless, and entirely unreadable Phillies news, you can either go read a Marcus Hayes column or stay here and enjoy the Saturday Poll.
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The Flotilla was last seen in Texas. Sal's Pals took their Norelco's north last season. The Wolfpack is most likely howling it's way out of town, and Burrell's Girls may creep along after them. Remember the Duckpond? That was just plain stupid. What's next, a Michael Bourn fan club? Well, yeah, maybe. I think the Cit needs some new fan clubs next year, and I have a few ideas. Which of the following is your favorite...or at least, which do you hate least?

Chase's Chubby Chasers - Where's the love for the fat chicks? Sure, when you need a slumpbuster, it's all good. But what about the rest of the time? Someone needs to lead a campaign to give some lovin' to the large ladies, and I think it should be the CCC. Picture it, a merry group of guys, whose three favorite things are the Phillies, Chase Utley, and girls wearing Phillies gear (maybe a Ben Rivera size 64 throwback jersey) who can't quite fit into their seat, so they have to sit in the handicapped section and end up spilling their jumbo-sized popcorn and nachos with extra cheese on some war veteran as they try to get out of their armless seat to get a large soda to wash down the 5 soft pretzels they just ate.

Flash's In-The-Pans - This group is modeled after Gordon's '06 season. You know, the "start strong, things look great, uh oh, here comes a sore shoulder, a rising ERA and a blown save or two; oh crap that first half success was just a flash in the pan." while most other fan groups will be made up of fans, but I wouldn't be surprised to see Bud Smith, Tom Marsh, Garrett Stephenson, Tony Longmire, Pat Combs, Ben Rivera, Bobby Munoz, or Mike Mimbs comprise the majority of this group.

Sandoval's What-The-Hell-Are-We-Doing-Here-Gang - Everyone in this group should watch the game with a perplexed look on their face as if to say, "Hey, how did I get here and why isn't anyone telling me to leave?" If a peanut vender tossed them a bag of nuts, they should drop it. If someone should insult a member of the WTHAWDH Gang, they should take a swing at the person, but miss by a mile. They should also stay as far away from the actual playing surface as possible. This way, they can be as much like Danny Sandoval as possible.

Lieber's Eaters - This group should be made up of dudes greater than 3 bills, and ladies that roll in at a duece, deuce and a half. They should only come to the ballpark on Hatfield Dollar Dog Days and must sit on the opposite side of the park from Chase's Chubby Chasers, otherwise the CCC wouldn't be able to watch the game. If Lieber gets traded, I hope it is to a city with lots of fat people(hello Chicago), so the group recruitment is easier.
New Fan Group?
The CCC's
Flash's Pans
Sandoval's Gang
The Eaters
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Poll Results
Here's a real shocker, Danny Tartabull is your winner in Worst Free Agent Signing. Thought that 0-7 season would put him behind Mike Jackson and his ZERO innings pitched. But I guess the only thing behind Mike Jackson is...oh, wrong Mike Jackson.
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I lied, my fervor cup runneth over. A little Hot Stove type material:

Off The List:
Sheffied to Tigers for Sanchez and 2 other guys. I'm okay with this from a Phillies perspective because he is old, injury prone, and I would rather have Soriano for the long-term. Also because those Floyd/Madson/Lieber rumors where obviously a joke and the Phils likely would have had to give up major pitching prospects to get Sheffield (Gonzalez, etc.) That being said, I don't get this from a Yankees point of view. They don't need to worry about saving money so why not keep Sheffield and play him at first? Is Giambi going to play first and then DH Melky Cabrera? Moreover, why trade him to Detroit, a team that already had the pitching and just enough hitting to knock NY out of the postseason. Now you gave them a 30 HR guy without the Tigers losing a major league player. Kind of a weird move, I think.
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Big one today versus Temple. Go Penn State!

Corey

17 comments:

GM-Carson said...

nice work of the word "fervor"...easily entertained.

i voted flashes-in-the-pans because it would be cool to go buy the like of mimbs, longmire, combs and company a brew and shoot the shit with them.

~carson

Chris said...

Had to go with leiber's eaters since it's so sad it's funny. this guy HAS to come into camp in shape this year for the phils toget out of the gate well.

C

Bob D said...

Leiber's Donut Eaters because it was so funny and the cool "HEY HEY HEY its Jon Leiber!".


Another freeagent to pursue and he should be listed higher than Soriano:

Dave Riske

His last name says it all. A definite Phillie if there ever was one. If it doesn't work out Gillick could pay him $3 mil to lead the 'Flashes in the Pan' club doing the wave.

GM-Carson said...

i would think the phils would put his fat ass on a better offseason conditioning program. he actually managed to pitch decently after 4/5 months of sweating his ass off pitching. he's a good pitcher if in shapr, and could be a huge asset to us rather than just a huge ass.

~carson

GM-Carson said...

riske would actually be a smart sign for the bullpen.

fans said...

It's fun to see the fan clubs show up each game - although the prices are so high I can't believe they can keep it up for the season. We miss Sal's Pals - but all Chase's Chicks seemed to do was to take pictures of themselves.

Also wanted to add another member to your LaSalle Alum poll. Not going to reveal the age -but those townhouses were pretty new when i lived there.

GM-Carson said...

the phillies phan groups are awesome...past philly groups i thought shoulda been:

1. thome's homies
2. in hell's bells or bell's belles
3. wade's gay parades
4. rheal's gals
5. kruk's nut..lone fan

Maria said...

CCC...obviously. What's better than seeing a bunch of Chubby Chicks screaming Chase's name?

skeeter said...

as of right now i am the only one who voted for sandovals group...so far my last memory of a phillies game in 2006 is him making an error to lose a game to the marlins

GM-Carson said...

sandoval is a loser. if he ever amounts to being a useful bench player i'll be suprised. bring back kevin sefcik!!!

~carson

skeeter said...

also...thanks for the link guys

BloodStripes said...

I could'nt go past flashes-in-the-pans. Awesome.

das411 said...

The Yankee fans at Bronx Banter (www.bronxbanter.baseballtoaster.com) seem to think they can now deal from their stockpile of SP prospects to pick up a Mark Teixiera. I suggest we offer then Howard instead, and maybe they'll take Utley too for some of those incredible can't miss because they NEVER do Yankee prospects...

Didn't Lieber say though that he pitches deeper into games when he is bigger? Does not tire as easily, etc? And is it too soon to officially define this as "Kevin Millwood Disease"?

And who wants to help me make those dumbasses over at TheGoodPhight talk themselves into wanting JD Drew?? Like the team would ever go after him, that couldn't possibly be the move that Gillick makes, after talks break down with Soriano over the no-trade and Aramis has already followed the $$ to LA...uhoh...

GM-Carson said...

jd drew a phillie? i guess i could brush my hatred of him aside...not!

it's now sunday...let the mayhem begin.

~carson

IUP Philly Fan said...

the best fan group i saw at the park this year was the "delluchebags" i have a picture of the sign if you want it.

GM-Carson said...

iup philly fan- dude, you need to email us that pic.

GM-Carson said...

i want that pic!