Thursday, April 13, 2006

Strange Brew


Finally, the state of Pennsylvania has a winning streak thanks to the Pirates. Buccos showing some pop in the bat, gotta like that! Phillies even managed not to throw away a game. I'm still vastly disappointed in Manuel's insistence to run David Bell out on the field regularly. But hey, a win is a win.

I've been doing some thinking on how to get the Phillies out of their funk, and I thought of Shakespeare. Yes, that Shakespeare, he of Macbeth, Romeo & Juliet, and Merchant of Venice. I thought of the 3 sinister sisters, the witches, from Macbeth creating that weird concoction, so I came up with one of my own to help render the Phillies' woes.

Recipe for Disaster:
1 lock of Mitch Williams' hair, 1 smashed Chris Wheeler microphone, the threads from the Joe Carter homerun ball, Danny Tartabull's contract, a clump of Rheal Cormier's hemorrhoids, the Julio Franco, Ryne Sandberg, and Curt Schilling trades, Mike Lieberthal's glove, 1 Dave Hollins' spider bite, a pinch of John Kruk's and Lenny Dykstra's chew, 2 Tomas Perez whipped cream pies, a slathering of pine tar from Jim Thome's batting helmet, Jose Mesa's blown saves, and a dash of Doug Jones' "filthy" array of changeups. *Season to taste with salt, pepper, and plenty of sarcasm.

That should exorcise those demons!

~Carson

1 comment:

GM-Carson said...

I need to do this strange brew for real.